Ark Mafia (Bellarke) Bellamy's Story
by JulietLiving
Summary: Clarke has just moved to Arkville to get away from their past. Her dad's in prison and she's stuck in a small town with two stop lights. Bellamy is stuck in a life that he never wanted. He only stays in this small town to keep his past in the past. What will happen when two people who are hiding their true selves find each other? Will sparks fly or will the fire consume them both?
1. Smokey Rooms and Bookworms

**Bellamy's POV**

I roll over and squint at the blurry lights flashing at me from the clock. I can't make out the time because there is a wall of smoke between me and the nightstand that it's sitting on. I can hear the distinct snoring next to me from the girl who has finally passed out. She was so clingy that I didn't even want to come with her into her room, but at the time it seemed a better idea than just sitting on the couch with the guys. Next time I will choose to just hang out with Murphy and Miller.

I slip away from the girl whose name I can't remember and honestly I'm not sure if I even asked. All I know is that she has red hair and a high pitched voice. And man is she loud. I slide off of the bed and find my jeans on the ground. I step into them and then find my shirt. I open the door as I'm pulling my shirt on.

"So, you and Kendra?" Murphy asks.

_Kendra. That's her name. _I don't waste time with answers. I'm not a girl. I don't talk about emotions or lack thereof. "I'm out. Don't forget, tomorrow we're meeting at the pier at 8:00. If you're late again I'll have to…" I let the silent threat sink in.

"I'll be there man. Seriously? I was late once. When will you let it go?" Murphy glares at me, but makes sure to not meet my eyes. He's an idiot, but not dumb enough to fight me.

"Don't forget, 8:00. Miller, get a couple of the new guys and have them help you clean this place up before you leave." I say to the guy who hasn't said a word. I like that he doesn't talk much.

I walk out of the house and suck in a deep breath of fresh air. None of the guys know how much I despise smoke. They all assume that I smoke because they do, but I have never even had one drag. I stay clear and find ways around it. I look at the yard and see cups, cans, and people strewn across the lawn. One boy is asleep in front of the gate to get out of the yard. I kick his red shoe to wake him up. He mumbles something incoherent and then starts snoring again.

"Kennedy, move it!" I shout at him. When he hears my voice he bolts up.

"Sorry, Bellamy." He mumbles and scoots a couple of feet before collapsing again.

I open the gate and don't bother with closing it. There are cars lined up on the street as well as motorcycles. I walk up to mine and straddle it. It purrs to life and I take off down the street. The moon lights my way as I shoot towards home. I really should have not come to the party tonight. I check my phone and see that it's just after 3:00. I have to be at work in two hours and then I have school after that. This is going to be a long day.

I speed through a red light a couple of blocks away from my house and flip off the person who honks at me. When I get to my driveway I kick down the kick stand and turn my bike off. I jump off of the bike before its even steady. I fish my house key out of my pocket and unlock the door. I make sure to stay quiet so as not to wake my sister, Octavia. She has always been a light sleeper.

"Hey, Bell. You were out late. Why didn't you call?" Her voice finds me in the darkness of our small house as if on cue.

"Sorry, O. Go back to sleep." I say as I look in from her doorway. She flips over to sleep on her stomach. I stand there watching and listening until I hear her breathing even out. Once she's sleeping I gently close her door so that I won't disturb her anymore.

With that I flip on the light in our kitchen. I see a note that says there's food in the fridge for me. I open the fridge to see a bowl with milk in it. Another note is attached to it. _You missed dinner. Enjoy your cereal. _

I chuckle as I pull the bowl out making sure to not spill the milk and grab a box of cereal. I place them all on the table next to my laptop. While eating I finish up a couple of assignments that I know are due soon. I click submit just as the sun shines in through the kitchen window. I check the time again to see that I have twenty minutes before I have to leave.

I tip toe past Octavia's room to go to the bathroom. After a quick shower I walk farther down the hall to my room with a towel around my waist. I grab a pair of clean jeans and pick up a shirt from the ground. After smelling it I decide that it's clean and pull it over my head. I use the towel to dry my dripping hair. Then I throw the towel in the hamper by my closet.

"Have a good day Bell." Octavia calls out as I pass her room.

"You too, O. I'll see you around 10:00." I say before grabbing my stuff and leaving.

I wish that there were a way that I could just be a normal college student, but I know that will never happen. Once you're part of the Ark gang you can never leave; especially when you're the head of a division. I lock the door and straddle my bike once again. On my way to work I stop to grab a coffee. That's when I see her. She's always here ever since she showed up a couple of weeks ago. It struck me as odd the first time I noticed her because Arkville is a place that people leave, rarely do people actually come in let alone stay.

But she's been here every morning since that first one. Of course I only know what I can see. She's beautiful and that's about all I know. She has long, blonde hair that glistens even in the dingy light of the diner and bright blue eyes that make me want to sink into them. She's always sitting in the corner booth of the diner sipping a coffee.

Some days she's reading while other days she's typing away on a laptop. Today she has a thick book laid out in front of her. She's so enthralled by what she's reading that she doesn't even look up. I love these days; don't get me wrong I love seeing her eyes, but when she's so captured by her books or work she looks like she is so at peace that it makes me feel at peace. She makes me think that maybe, just maybe I could have a shot at having a life.

"Here you go, baby." Indra hands me my coffee in a to go cup just like every other morning. She also gives me a paper bag that I know has a muffin in it.

"Thanks. I'll see you tomorrow." I drop my money on the counter making sure to leave a generous tip.


	2. Late Nights and Friends

**Clarke's POV**

"Do you want a refill, baby?" Indra, the waitress at the diner asks me.

"No thanks. I think I better head home. I'll see you tomorrow." I grab the book I've been reading all night and gently tuck it into my backpack. My laptop that's sitting on the table next to my empty mug and crumb covered plate is blinking at me with a silent alarm. It's 5:00 am. My mom will be getting home in thirty minutes. That's just enough time for me to jog home and beat her there. I slap my computer closed and shove it in my bag along with my homework.

"Thanks again for the coffee and the cinnamon roll was delicious." I tell Indra as I walk to the door.

"Anytime, baby." She waves me off.

My converse covered feet slap against the sidewalk as I start to run home. I hear a car driving up so I duck into the alley between the ice cream shop and hardware store. I lean out just enough to peer at the car. _Mom?_ I look at my watch, the one that my dad gave me the night before he got arrested. 5:04. _She's early._ I take off sprinting behind the stores and houses on my way to our tiny house. Because I'm cutting through yards I get there just after my mom's car pulls into the driveway.

I watch her go inside and then sneak up to the house. I take a peek inside and see her in the kitchen. If this were our old house I could climb the tree and jump in through the second story window, but here's there's only one floor. She's pulling eggs out of the fridge. I know that she's making breakfast for me before I go to school. It's my first day at the new school. I decide to just bite the bullet and walk inside. First though I drop my bag on the side of the porch, tie my hair up in a ponytail and pull off my shirt so that I'm in a tank top and my yoga pants. I'm glad I wore those today.

I take a breath and then open the door. "Hey, Mom. How was work?"

"It was great, sweetie. And how did you sl-" She snaps her mouth shut when she turns to see me coming in the front door. She gives me a glare that reminds me of our old selves. She looks like the wife of the mob boss rather than the small town doctor that she's pretending to be.

"Where have you been?" She asks me after setting down the eggs and turning completely to face me. Her hands are on her small hips.

"I was out for a run." I motion to my clothes and give her a look of contempt. Ever since my dad got arrested we've been walking on thin ice.

"You know that I don't like you out on your own." She gives me a disapproving sigh.

"Mom, I'm almost eighteen and we're in a nowhere town. I'm fine. Plus, I always have my good friends with me." I slip the knife out of my back pocket and show her. I then reach down to take my shoes off and pull out the knife from my sock. Sure it's not actually a great place to keep it, but when I have no pockets it works.

"I still don't like it. Maybe I should try harder to get the day shift." She says and I can see the wheels start to turn in her mind.

"No, Mom. We both know that you do better with this shift. Plus, I have the anklet on so if I were ever in trouble help would be there in less than five minutes." I pull down my other sock to show her my ankle monitor. When my dad got arrested I didn't take it well and ended up getting in some big trouble. They made a deal with my mom and me that if we moved away from the area, cut all ties, and cleaned up our act then they'd let me out on parole instead of sending me to juvie or worse.

I would have rather taken the time, but my mom didn't want to lose both of us so she took the deal. That was five weeks ago. We've been here for just under a month. It took some time for us to get my records here so I've been doing a sort of home schooling through the school here. It's so easy that I could so the work in my sleep, if I could sleep that is. Ever since we got here I've been sleeping just a couple of hours a night if I sleep at all. Then I would go out and explore. Sure, this town is tiny and there really is nothing but I have seen on the outskirts of town that there is a bit of a nightlife.

So far I've stayed clear of it because I know if I get caught anywhere near something illegal then I'll be locked up. No second chances. No excuses. That's why I was happy when I found the diner that's always open. It struck me as odd for such a small town to have a twenty-four hour place but there is a steady stream of people constantly. I have been going there every night since I found it. I love it there especially just before 5:00 when that guy comes in.

I've heard Indra call him Bellamy once. He has dark hair that's just long enough to curl. It always looks messy like he's just gotten out of bed. I want to run my fingers through it. I've dreamed of doing just that in fact. Then his eyes; they're warm like mocha. They look kind even when he scowls. I can tell that he's more dangerous than kind though. He always has on a black leather jacket, black boots, and jeans. When he gets on his motorcycle all I can think is that I wonder what it would be like to be on the back of it with my arms wrapped around him. Would he be a cautious driver? No, he'd be fun.

"Clarke, you better hurry and get in the shower. You have to leave soon or you'll be late. And make sure you leave those _friends _here." My mom's voice pulls me out of my daydreaming. When she says friends she points to the knives that I'm holding.

I look down at them and chuck them at the wall without looking. I hear them slam into the dart board that I have hanging on the wall. I don't have to look to know that they hit the bullseye.


	3. Welcome to Arkville

**Bellamy's POV**

I ease my bike into the school parking lot a minute before I need to be clocked in. I jump off of my baby as soon as I have the kickstand down and run to the door. The only door that's unlocked this early is the one by the principal's office which means that I'll have to pass his office. I slow to a walk when I'm inside and make my way down the hall. I look into his office and can't see him so I let out a sigh of relief. He won't see me get here. He won't have to know that I was late.

"You're late, again." Jaha looks down at me from over his nose that's stuck up at me.

If I were a jumpy guy my head would have hit the ceiling. I hadn't heard him walk up behind me. I turn around to face him and plaster an innocent look on my face.

"I'm sorry, sir. I assure you that it won't happen again." I have to force myself to not fight him. He seems to be one of the only people who has no idea what I'm capable of.

"See that it doesn't. One more screw up and you'll be out of here." He sneers.

"Yes, sir." I grab my job list for the day and leave Jaha in his office. Just as I'm walking to the janitor's closet to get my uniform I see her. It surprises me to see her with a backpack on. I just assumed that she wasn't in school from the fact that she's been in the diner every morning and I haven't seen her before.

She's walking right towards me and I have never felt this nervous. I never feel nervous. Girls are easy for me. They fawn over me and I decide whether or not I want to use them. If I do then I put on the charm; if not then I walk away. It might be cruel but it works for me.

"Excuse me, do you know where the office is?" Her voice is strong yet soft. She gives me a warm smile and waits for me to speak.

I clear my throat while trying to find my voice. What is happening to me? "It's just down the hall. Take the first right."

"Thank you, Bellamy." She says before walking off in the direction that I pointed.

When she says my name a bunch of red flags pop up. I start walking behind her and grab her arm when I get close. "How do you know my name?"

"The diner. I heard Indra call you that once." She answers before pulling her arm from my grasp.

"Oh, sorry." I say while letting her pull back from me. "And you are?"

"I'm Clarke." She says and gives me a warm smile.

"Welcome to Arkville. If you need anything else just let me know. I'll be around." I shake the hand that she holds out to me.

"Thank you. I'll see you around." She saunters off down the hall without a second glance which I'm thankful about because I am staring after her retreating form. The worst part is that I'm not checking her out just because she's hot; I think I actually want to get to know her. When I shook her hand I hadn't wanted to let go. That has never happened to me. I'm in trouble.


	4. New Girl K

**Clarke's POV**

I walk away from Bellamy while trying not to die from embarrassment. I can't believe I said his name. The way he grabbed my arm and his suspicious expression told me how much it freaked him out. He probably thinks I'm a crazy stalker. Way to go, idiot! I'm too busy scolding myself so I don't notice the boy directly in front of me until we've bumped into each other.

"Oh my gosh. I'm so sorry." I stutter at the boy as he just laughs. His laugh at least isn't a mocking laugh; it's more of a I'm laughing with you laugh.

"It's all good. You must be Clarke. I'm Finn." He says in a kind voice full of laughter.

"You know who I am because I ran into you?" I ask as my always ready temper tries to boil over.

"No. I know who you are because you're the only new person we've had in over three years." He says in a matter of fact voice.

"Right. I do remember hearing something about not many new people in the area. Of course it makes sense. Who chooses to move to a middle of nowhere, hick town?" I ask

"Ouch." He grips his chest in mock pain. "That hurts, K."

"K?" I ask with a smile breaking across my face. Maybe this place won't be too bad.

"I hope you don't mind. It's just that Clarke is so… I don't know. _Hicktown?_" He winks.

"Says the boy named Finn."

"Hey, I'm a man. I turned eighteen last month." He says and puffs out his chest.

"Oh my apologies, sir." I curtsy to him.

"That's more like it. Now, how about I give you the tour?" He waves his hand towards the direction that I just came from.

"Maybe later, but for now I have to go meet with Principal Jaha. Thank you though." I go to step around Finn but he places his hand on my arm. His touch doesn't feel near as good as Bellamy's did.

"I already talked to him. He had a meeting come up and asked if I'd take you under my wing. I agreed, but only after making sure you were cute." He winks again.

"So, you think I'm cute?" I flirt. I instantly feel guilty as if I were cheating on someone.

"You know it, baby." He says as he caresses my arm with his hand that is still there. It makes me feel uncomfortable. I'm not sure why though. I just don't want anyone to see us. _You don't want Bellamy to see you._ My thoughts turn against me.

"So, about that tour; do you think we could start it now?" I ask while stepping away so that my arm is free from his wandering hand.

"Sure. Follow me." He holds out his arm and I know that he expects me to take it. I don't. He shrugs it off and leads me down the hall.

I see Bellamy down the hallway and instantly feel embarrassed. I don't want to pass by him. I think I'd be okay without ever speaking to him again.

"Finn…" Bellamy says his name in a way that makes it sound like a threat. I half expect him to add: you're next. But, I've probably just seen too many scary movies. It's not like this town could have anything dark or sinister.

"Bellamy." Finn nods his head and subtly steps farther away from him. When we've walked out of range from Bellamy I hear Finn mumble. "What a freak."

"What did you just say about him?" I ask surprised to hear something mean come out of Finn's mouth. I may not know him well but he seems decent.

"He's a freak; that guy. Don't tell anyone that I told you that, though." I'm once again surprised to see genuine fear in his eyes. "I'll give you some advice to live by: stay away from Bellamy Blake. He's dangerous."

"Okay, thanks." I say aloud while in my head I rejoice. Dangerous? That's exactly what I need right now. Well, I guess it's just what I want. What I need is someone who well never find out who I really am. Someone who is kind and boring. Someone like Finn.


	5. Memories

**Bellamy's POV**

I clench my fist to keep from slugging Finn right in his pretty boy face when he walks up with Clarke. I already hate him but seeing him flirt with Clarke is just too much. When they walk off down the hallway I hear her giggle I have to hold steady. I want to teach Finn what a real fight feels like. He's on the wrestling team and football team which means he sees himself as a golden boy. It doesn't help that practically everyone in this stupid town worship him and his family already.

He is the boy who was born with the silver spoon. And I'm the boy on the wrong side of the tracks. Granted I actually did great in school. Not many people know about that because I had and still have a part to play. That's why I took this job as a janitor. As soon as Octavia graduates though we can get out of here. We'll leave and never look back. I already have most of our meager belongings packed.

It's another of my secrets. If anyone in this town found out that I planned to leave without coming back I would be six feet under the ground and Octavia would be worse off than me. My uncle tried to leave and let's just say we never heard from him again and the cops didn't even waste their energy on a manhunt.

A couple weeks after he disappeared I was promoted to his position. I can remember that moment like it was yesterday rather than five years ago.

_"__Blake, get in here!" Nyko yelled from inside his office. I was fourteen and mostly just cleaned for them. Every once in a while Nyko or his second in command Lincoln would take me out with them on jobs. There was a certain thrill that made me like going on those jobs, but later I realized that the thrill was their hook. They planned which jobs to take me on to get me begging for more. I only know that know because they have me do just that to young recruits._

_"__Blake!" Nyko yelled again._

_"__I'm coming." I called back. I ran to the office to keep him from getting angry._

_"__Close the door and sit down." He said without turning around to face me._

_"__Yes, sir." I gently closed the door and took a seat in the chair that I just saw someone get tortured in an hour ago. I was terrified. I only could keep from shaking because I knew if I showed fear I'd be a liability. And in this business there is no room for liabilities. _

_"__Son, I have a job for you. As you know your uncle has left leaving us without a bookkeeper. We would like you to take over for him. I know that you will not be a disappointment like he was." He said after turning around to look me in the eyes._

_"__Bookkeeper?" I asked in shock. _

_"__Yes, I understand that you are very good with numbers. Anya tells me that you are advancing quickly. You are already taking college level math courses. That's very impressive."_

_"__Yes, sir I am. Who is Anya?" I asked after racking my mind for someone with that name and coming up empty. _

_"__She is the Vice Principal."_

_"__Ms. Forest? You work with Ms. Forest?" _

_"__More like she works with me. She helps cover up things for me occasionally and I make sure that she is protected. But, that doesn't matter. You cannot let anyone know about her or speak to her regarding this unless I tell you to. Understood?" He raises his eyebrow and I see his hand clutch the pistol at his belt._

_"__Understood."_

_"__Also, you cannot let anyone know about your new position. If anyone finds out it will be you who answers for it and I'd hate for Octavia to lose another family member. Wouldn't you?"_

"Bell?" O's voice pulls me out of my thoughts. I look up at her and see that she's holding a plastic bag.

"Hey, O. How was your morning?" I ask as I continue to mop. I look at my watch and see that it's just before 7:00 am. Wow, time has flown.

"Better than yours. I brought you some lunch." She tosses the bag to me.

"Thanks, O." I catch the bag easily. I see Principal Jaha watching us with his piercing eyes. "I better get back to work. See you around."

"Yes, duty calls. I'll see you at lunch?" She asks.

"Of course. I wouldn't miss lunch with my little sis, especially on her birthday." I reach forward and tousle her hair like I used to when we were little.

She smiles even when she tries to glare and sound angry. "Stop it. Gosh, I'm not five."

"I know. Love you."

"Love you too, big brother." She sticks her tongue out and walks off.

**A/N Thank you for reading, following, favorites, and your reviews. Hope you enjoy!**


	6. Self-Defense

**I'm going to stop writing the POV because mostly it will just be Bellamy. If it's someone else then I will write it at the beginning of the chapter like before.**

"Hey, man. That party last night was sick. Is there going to be another tonight?" Atom slaps me on the back as he enters the storage closet that we use as our break room. We're allowed in the teacher's lounge but it's always filled with people who either hate me or think I'm wasting my life.

"Of course. When has there not been a party on a Friday night?" I ask with a smirk.

"True. I have got to say I'm sure glad that you stayed here. If you had left for school like you wanted to when we were kids I would be hating life." He grabs a handful of pretzels from the bag that I keep on my shelf. When we made this into our break room we each picked a shelf and filled it with things that we might need. Mine was filled with mostly food and an extra set of clothes in case I have a late night.

Atom's is more what you'd expect from a hoodlum. He has jars that are filled with different drugs, mostly weed and cigarettes. But, I know that there are other things because I've seen him selling. That's his part in the gang. He is a pusher. If he weren't my best friend I know that I would hate him. I hate him sometimes and we _are _best friends.

We found this room back in tenth grade and it wasn't until this year that I found out that Anya knew about it. I was walking down the hall one day when I saw her talking to a teacher. I slipped into an empty classroom and listened to their conversation. She was telling him that no one except janitors were allowed inside. She said it was because of a health and safety thing. He seemed to buy it but the next day I tried to go inside and found it locked. I went to Anya's office and she gave me a key. We never talked about what went on and I think it's better that way.

"So, are you ready to sub for the P.E. teacher?" Atom asks me as he lights up a cigarette.

"Why? You're here and you don't look hungover." I said. I hate teaching especially when it's the class that Octavia's in. I still don't know how he got the position, but I'm sure it has something to do with Nyko and Anya.

"Come on man. I'll clean the bathrooms." He pleads with me.

"Deal." I toss him the mop that was behind me and push myself away from the wall I was leaning against. "What was the plan for today?"

"Self-defense. Just the basics." He waves his hand pushing smoke towards me.

A couple minutes later I'm in the gym and waiting for students to arrive. They shuffle in and my eyes don't register anything after I see her walk in laughing with Octavia.

"Clarke?" I ask out loud and instantly regret it.

"Yes, she's new. Clarke this is my brother, Bellamy, the one I was telling you about. Where's Atom?" She asks and tries to hide the blush on her cheeks.

"I told you to stay away from him, O." I scold her and then look to the students who are all looking to me for directions. Most of them look terrified. At least with my job they will do as I say. There's the one good part of being seen as a monster.

"Run five laps and then get in a big circle!" I tell them. Instantly they start running in a huddle. When they've finished they make a circle in the middle of the gym around the mats that I've put out.

"Okay, we're going to be learning some basic self-defense moves. Who here knows some?" I ask the crowd and see that almost everyone is raising a hand. "I need a volunteer."

All of the girls step closer and look at me like they want to eat me. All of them lean forward except Octavia who makes a gag face and Clarke who steps back. The guys look at me with fear and envy.

"How about the new girl." I say to the group and have to hold back a laugh when the girls groan. Clarke slowly makes her way to the center of the circle and looks up at me with big, blue eyes.

"Don't worry, Princess. I won't hurt you." I whisper.

"You're the one who should be worried." She says so quietly that I almost don't hear her.

I laugh and turn her around. "Okay, so I'm going to try and grab her from behind." I reach around her and grab her arms.

"If someone is holding you like thi-" Before I can even blink I am slamming into the mat. My back hits hard and I look up to see Clarke smiling. No one except Octavia laughs which makes it not as bad as it could be.

"So, I take it you know a little." I smirk and take the hand she's holding out for me.

"You have no idea." She winks and I feel her thumb make a circle on the back of my hand.


	7. The Gate

"O, wait up!" I call after her as she walks to the gate of the school. They put a fence up around the school a couple of years ago to try and keep students from sneaking out. What they don't know is that we have Raven and Wick. Raven is a senior this year and Wick graduated with me. They're our gate keepers. A week after the gate was up they were already making money by giving people passage out of the school.

Since Raven and Octavia are such good friends we get to use the passage for free. Wick and I aren't exactly friends, but we get along well enough. He's too much of a joker for my taste.

"Hurry up then. We only have about thirty seconds to get out." She calls back. "Also, I hope that you don't mind but I invited Clarke. She'll meet us at the gate."

When I hear her name I feel a blush come to my cheeks because I flash back to the self-defense class. "_You have no idea."_ I don't know why but that hit me hard. I just can't get it out of my head; her confidence, her sapphire eyes, the way she threw me over her like I was nothing.

Snap out of it, Bell. You can't do this. You don't deserve any of it. You need to just lay low and make it a couple more months. My heart and head have never argued this much. Usually my heart stays dorment, just the way I like it. My heart? Gosh, I sound like a chick flick.

"Bell, is it okay?" Octavia is staring at me as if I've just sprouted horns.

"What?" I ask not remembering her question. Oh, that Clarke is coming. "I mean, yeah."

"Good. Now can we go? We only have ten seconds." Octavia takes off running to the gate of course that only takes three steps.

"Took you guys long enough." Raven scolds and practically shoves us through the hole in the fence. "Now, you better be back in forty-five minutes. I won't wait."

"We know the drill Raven. Now shut up and go have some fun with your boyfriend." Octavia gives her blushing friend a hug and then we take off to our house. Clarke wasn't at the gate or waiting outside. I wonder where she is. Did she decide not to come? Was it because of me?

"Wasn't Clarke coming? You said she would be at the gate." I ask after I can't take it any longer.

"Aren't we the little eager beaver?" She teases and when I don't respond she continues. "Yeah. I told her to wait for us by the fort if we weren't at the gate when she got there." Octavia says and shrugs her shoulders. "Of course I didn't think you'd take so long. I hope she finds it okay."

"O, it hasn't even been a whole minute. I'm sure she could have waited." Then it hits me where she said Clarke was waiting. "Wait, did you say she was going to be at the fort?"

"Yep. Is there something wrong with that?"

My heart starts pounding and my body goes weak. "Please don't be there," is all I can think as I start to sprint.

"Bell? What's going on? Bell?" Octavia yells after me as I run to the last place I want Clarke to be at this very moment.


	8. The Fort

"Bell!" Octavia is running after me but I just go faster. I can't breathe let alone try to explain to Octavia that Murphy is in the fort, with a butt load of guns. He lost a bet and has to clean them all for the next three months. He can't have them in his house so no cleaning days he has them all dropped off at the tree house. Murphy is a scary enough guy without guns.

I stop running when I see her standing under the tree house with her hands on her hips. She is holding her hand up to block the sun from her eyes.

"That is one impressive armory you have up there." She says pointing up.

"Thanks. I like to _hunt." _ I say it as if it's a question and mentally kick myself. Way to sell it, idiot.

"Yeah, Murphy was telling me about it."

My heart starts to race and my hands form into fists. I wonder what else he's told her or worse, what he's done. It's only been a minute or two at most. He hasn't done anything, I assure myself.

"Murphy? He's up there?" I ask in a low voice.

"Yeah, and to be honest he kind of gives me the creeps, which is why I'm waiting down here." She gives me an apologetic smile.

"It's not just you." I smile and she laughs. I turn to O just as she catches up. " I have to tell Murphy something. I'll be down in a sec. Wait here."

"Sure thing, bro. Just hurry." She taps the watch on her arm. I nod my head and hurry up the ladder.

When I get to the top I see Murphy sitting in the corner cleaning a shotgun.

"So, Clarke." He says as he flings the gun to snap it into place.

"Off limits." I say in the most authoritative voice I have. It's the one that makes any sane person buckle to my will. I just wish that Murphy were sane.

"Oh, has our might leader found his next conquest?" He smirks at me.

"Just stay back. Got it?" I grip the knife that's hooked to my belt.

"Chill out, man." He holds his hands up in surrender. "I won't touch her, unless she wants me to." He winks and I want to slice him open, but I just pull my hand away from my knife and back away from him to go down the ladder.

Murphy may be on my side but I will never turn my back to him. I know he'd have a knife stabbed in it so fast that I wouldn't even be able to say: I told you so.

"Finally, you took forever." Octavia smacks my arm when I stick my tongue out at her.

We hurry to the house because we have less than forty minutes before we have to be back at school. I'm glad once again that Octavia's birthday lunch is grilled cheese sandwiches, tomato soup, and fruit salad. It's an easy and fast meal. I unlock the door and let the girls go in before me.

"All right O, you know the drill. Go sit down and get ready to be pampered." I say as I walk to the kitchen.

"Yes! My birthday is the best!" She squeals and does a happy dance before sitting down on the couch.

"What can I do to help?" Clarke asks from behind me. I know I should tell her to go sit with Octavia, but I choose to be selfish.

"Are you okay with using a knife? Would you like to cut fruit?"

She laughs and nods her head. "Yes, I think I can manage. Where are they?"

"In the cup by the stove. They're pretty sharp so be careful."

"I know how to cut fruit Bellamy."

I love the way my name sounds coming from her. I revel in the feeling as I pull out the things that we'll need for lunch. I stop when I hear Clarke let out a little cough.

"Actually, will you help me with this first cut?" She flutters her eyelashes at me and I think I've died.

**A/N Thanks for reading, following, and your reviews! This is so fun to write. I hope you're enjoying it.**


	9. Knives and Fruit

"You want me to help you?" I ask as if I'm a twelve year old boy and she's asking me to hold her hand.

"Would you? I don't want to hurt myself." She holds the knife away from her body over the cutting board.

I take in a deep breath and step behind her. "Sure. So, you hold it like this." I reach my arms around her and place my hand over hers. Then, let's do the apple first. I reach past her to pick up the apple and throw it up in the air. Before it hits the cutting board I catch it and set it down.

"Nice catch." Clarke whispers.

"Thanks. Now the most important part is to hold the apple correctly so you don't cut your fingers." I pick up her hand that's been resting on the counter. I slide my fingers through hers and grab the apple. "Make sure that your fingers are straight up, like this." I use my fingers to move hers to the right position. I would be lying if I didn't say I was taking me sweet time.

"Now with the knife place it above the apple and you'll slide it down slowly, but sharply." Our hands move down as one and the two halves of the apple fall away from the knife. Clarke twists her hand that's no longer holding the apple so that our palms are touching. She looks up with her ocean-filled eyes and I can see the hint of a spark in them. I lean down and she drops the knife and turns to face me so our joined hands are between us.

"What is taking so long?" Octavia's voice shatters the moment. I see a blush shoot across Clarke's cheeks and she drops me hand. She turns back to the fruit and I have to take some breaths to stop myself from flipping her around and kissing her. I have never hated Octavia more than I do at this very moment. "You better not be doing something stupid like flirting instead of making my birthday lunch!"

"It's almost ready, O!" I call back through clenched teeth.

I look back at Clarke so that I can apologize for what just almost happened, but when I look at her my mouth drops open. On the cutting board is a completely diced apple and she's working on slicing some strawberries. Her hand is moving so fast that I can barely focus on it. I stand there mesmerized.

"Do you think strawberries and apples are good enough?" She asks without looking at me.

"Yeah, yes, that's good." I stutter like a fool.

"Okay," Her eyes finally meet mine again and I see a twinkle of humor in them. "I'll take these out and distract Octavia while you finish up."

She swipes the knife across the cutting board causing the fruit to fall into a bowl on the counter. Not a single piece misses it's mark. I don't waste my time with love but I sure like this girl. She makes me feel the closest I've ever felt to wanting to be with someone for more than a couple hours. I can't figure her out and I like it.


	10. The Calm Before the Storm

The rest of the day flies by and thankfully I don't see Clarke again after we get back to school. I'm not sure my heart can take more of her. I'm surprised I made it through lunch, let alone having her pop up randomly at school. The worst part of it all is that at the same time I feel hurt that I haven't seen her. Is she choosing to stay away?

Pull yourself together man. You have other things to worry about. Stop thinking about that girl. She's just like the others. She just wants something from you and then she'll be gone.

"Hey, Bell. Are you ready to go? Nyko wants us to stop by his place before going." Miller claps me on the back.

"Sounds good, just let me tell O." I walk quickly to find her because I know Nyko doesn't like to wait. I see her talking to a certain blonde haired, blue eyed, devil that I can't get out of my head no matter how many lectures I give myself. She is trouble and I know it.

"Hey, O, I've got a couple things to do before tonight. I'll meet you at the party." I say quickly so that I can turn and leave without talking to them.

"Cool. Wait, Bell, I was telling Clarke that she has to come. Don't you think she has too?" Octavia wraps her arm around Clarke and makes her face me.

"Yeah, of course. It's a rite of passage. I'll see both of you there. Don't go in until I'm there, no matter who's there O, got it?"

"Gosh, I sneak in one time and you can't let it go." She gives me a nod letting me know that she understands.

I walk over to where Miller is waiting. Murphy is with him now and he looks like he's been in a fight. I groan inwardly and clench my fists.

"What was it this time, Murph?" I ask him as he picks at a bleeding wound on his knuckle.

"What? Oh this?" He points to his bleeding hand and shrugs. "It was nothing. I handled it myself."

"I still want to know what happened." I say and when he doesn't answer I take a step closer to him towering over him. "Now."

"Chill man, seriously. First the fort and then this. What's going on with you? Is it the blonde chick? She's hot but not worth losing your head over."

"Murphy," I hiss, "tell me who you fought and why."

"Fine. It was Sterling. It was nothing though. He just tried to take one of my customers." He finally admits.

"Next time don't make me ask again." I say before stepping back. "Let's go."

We get to Nyko's and do a couple of side jobs for him before going to the pier. We get there just before 8:00 which means we have to sit and wait. Miller and Murphy pull out cigarettes and take long drags. Murphy, as always, blows his smoke directly into my face. Normally I just ignore it but I'm more tightly wound than usual so I can't take it.

I pull the knife out that's hooked to my belt and before Murphy can even flinch I've cut his cigarette right down to his lips. He makes a small whining sound in the back of his throat, but is smart enough, for once, and stays silent. He spits out the butt and crosses his arms.

Miller, who hasn't said anything either, slowly drops his cigarette to the ground and stomps it out. He gives me a look to warn me that I need to calm down. Unlike with Murphy I actually listen to him. I take a deep breath and slip my knife back into its holder. Atom walks up at that point and gives me a questioning look. I look to Murphy and then roll my eyes.

My phone starts buzzing which breaks through our silent tension. I pull it from my pocket and see Nyko is calling. I swipe the phone with my finger and put it to my ear.

"Bellamy." I say.

"Are you there?" He asks.

"Yes."

"Good. Have Atom stay. I want you and Miller to go to that party of yours. Send Murphy back here."

"Understood." I hang up and slip the phone into my pocket.

"Atom you're supposed to stay put. Murphy go back to Nyko's and Miller we get to go to the party." I say and I have a very bad feeling about the situation. Something feels off. He wouldn't have sent us all out here just to leave one behind. Something is going on that he's not telling me about.


	11. Killer Dress

It's just after nine when Miller and I get to my house and I see the lights all off. I don't wait to turn the engine off in my car before dashing to the front door. It's open. The adrenaline is pumping through my veins so fast that I can't hear a single thing except the blood rushing.

I shove the door open and already have my gun pulled out from the holster at my side. I'm glad that I actually have it on me. I hear a squeal from Octavia's room and then another. I am can't make out anything else except when there is a big crash and more screaming. I don't waste time on turning the doorknob. I just kick the door down without stopping.

"Ahhhh!" Octavia screams at the top of her lungs.

"Bell! Did you just kick my door down?" Octavia glares at me from the floor where she's sitting. It looks like she fell.

"What happened?" I ignore her question because I'm still trying to calm down. She's okay. It's not like last time. Everything is okay.

"You kicked my door down. That's what happened. Now, get out!" Clarke leans down to help Octavia up which is when I notice her for the first time since I got in the room. When I do see her my mouth goes dry and I can't help but skim my eyes down and back up her body.

She has dark makeup around her eyes that make them look huge, and not in the creepy goth way like that girl Harper at school. She has bright red lips that I want to bite into, of course not for pain. And the dress, more like shirt she's wearing barely goes past mid-thigh. It clings to her like a second skin and leaves next to nothing to my imagination which is running on full blast at the moment.

"Bell, quit being such a creep." O's voice pulls me out of my thoughts, but I still can't pull my eyes away from Clarke.

"Do you like it?" Clarke asks and gives me a shy smile and I can see a hint of a blush on her cheeks. It throws me off that she looks nervous because all I've seen from her so far is confidence. This new side of her makes me want to grab her, hold her close, and never let go.

"You look amazing." I say and am surprised at the huskiness of my own voice.

"Thank you. So you think this will be okay to wear to my first party in Arkville?" She does a twirl and all I can think about it how much I wish we could just stay here.

"Yes, definitely." Then my mind clears and I start to think of all of the guys that will be staring at her and thinking the same thing as me. I'm instantly furious.

"No!" I shout and she looks at me with hurt eyes. "I mean. No, you'll get cold. Change. Wear jeans and a hoodie or something."

"What? Bell, you know it's 80 degrees outside right? She looks hot. She should obviously wear it." O says and I finally tear my eyes away from Clarke for long enough to give O a death glare. Her eyes widen with understanding.

"No, you are not ruinning another friendship of mine. Back up and go. We'll see you there." O shoves me out the door and I trip over the broken door. "And just so you know I expect this to be fixed by the time we get home." She points at the door laying on the ground.

"Don't worry, I'll fix it. And Clarke please just put _more _on." I plead with the firecracker next to my sister.

"What were you talking about? Ruining friendships?" I hear Clarke ask as I go to my room.

**A/N Thanks for reading, following, favoriting, and the reviews. Hope you enjoy this chapter! Stay tuned, the next chapter will be up in a couple of hours.**


	12. Party Time

"Are you ready to go, O? Clarke?" I call from the hallway around the sheet that's covering Octavia's doorway. I tried to fix the door but it broke too much when I kicked it down so I have to actually go buy a new. Octavia was not happy to say the least, but she'll get over it.

"Yes, just one sec." O's voice comes through the sheet and I hear her let out a gasp.

"Yes, it's perfect!" She says and then I hear Clarke give her a humble "thanks". I know that her head is bowed a little and she is blushing.

"What's perfect?" I ask, finally not able to wait any longer.

"Ready to see my masterpiece?" Octavia peeks her head around the sheet to look at me.

"Yes, just hurry." I say in what she probably takes as impatience when really I'm just trying to not let my hands shake from the nerves caused by a certain beauty in her room. I want to see her in that dress again, but I also hope to all heavens that she is wearing something else. I know for sure if she's not then I will end up in the hospital tonight; that or jail.

"Okay, me first." Octavia saunters out in the silver shirt I got her for her birthday. It goes farther down on one side to her mid-thigh while the shorter side ends at her hip. I picked it out because it's not very revealing so I don't have to worry about her as much. She also has on black leggings that have silver designs down the side. Personally I'd prefer she wear sweats and a hoodie, but it's not as bad as some of her other clothes. She jumps forward to give me a peck on the cheek.

"Thank you, Bell. I look amazing!" She hugs me again and that's when the sheet is pulled back to reveal Clarke. My heart starts racing and adrenaline rushes through my veins.

"You look beautiful." I say and Octavia who doesn't know that Clarke has come out of the room thanks me. Clarke bows her head and I can see a blush just like I imagined.

"And Clarke, words can't describe your beauty." I say and have no idea where the words have come from. If anyone had heard me say that I'd probably be a dead man.

"Thank you." She smiles up at me. "You look great yourself."

I look down at my dark jeans that could probably use a wash, my black shirt, and leather jacket and know she's just being kind. Sure, I'm aware of the fact that girls find me attractive, but I'm nothing compared to her.

I let my eyes wander for just a moment. I take in the red top that she has on that still goes down more than I'd like it to and it holds to her curves a little too perfectly. Her dark jeans look like they were made for her. And she is almost as tall as me with the red heels that she has on. I have no idea how she is standing, let alone walking in them. What I know is I like it. I notice a slight bulge on at her left ankle but don't ask about it.

"Let's go party already!" Octavia grabs Clarke's hand and mine. She tugs us to the door and Clarke laughs.

When we get to the house the music is pumping so loudly that we can barely hear ourselves while yelling inside the car. I'm driving and the girls are in the back of the car.

"No drinks from anyone except me, got it?" I shout at them both. They nod their heads in agreement. "And O, only one beer and then you switch to any pop or water that you want!"

"I'm eighteen, Bell, I can take care of myself."

"You're not getting out of this car until you agree." I click the lock on the door.

"Fine. One beer and a shot." She gives me a pleading smile.

"Deal, but only because it's your birthday." I unlock the doors and we get out.

Octavia runs into the house already talking to some of her friends. Clarke walks after her a little slower. I grab her hand before she gets inside. "Hey, be careful okay. People can get pretty rowdy here."

"Just like at any other party." She nods her head though when I don't let go of her arm. "And don't worry about O. I'll keep an eye on her. You look like you need to loosen up and have some fun."

With that she walks away and I am left watching her hair swish across her back. I grab a beer from Miller's hand as he walks out of the house and down it in one drink.

"I guess I'm going to go get a beer. Want one?" He asks in an irritated voice.

"No, I'm good man." I follow him into the house.


	13. Raven

When I step inside I instantly regret it. I can see Octavia talking to Atom and she's twirling her hair around her finger. That's never a good sign. But, at least I know where she is and it's not the worst thing I see. Right in the middle of the living room which has been made into a dance floor is Clarke. She's dancing to the beat perfectly. She looks beautiful except for the leech on her arm. I have never wanted to kill anyone until this moment.

Seeing Finn holding her hips and dancing makes something in me snap. A hand smack into my back and without thinking I grab the arm and twist. I hear a yelp of pain and it pulls me out of the rage. I drop the hand and turn around to see Atom.

"Hey, man. I just wanted to see how you're doing? But, I guess I know." He says rubbing his wrist. He laughs. "Gosh, this makes me wonder; why am I the enforcer?"

"Yeah, sorry about that. I was just," I don't finish my sentence.

"You were just staring at the new girl dancing with Finn. Murphy told me about your little conversation earlier. I didn't believe him, but it's true isn't it?" He looks at me not as my friend but as my partner. He will bring the answer back to Nyko. I can't let him know about her.

"Seriously? You actually think I've fallen for a chick. You do know me right? No, it's more like she's Octavia's friend and I don't want Murphy messing with her. It would bother O." I laugh off his question.

"Good, because Nyko would not like it." He lets out a sigh of relief. "Man, I really thought that I was going to have to enforce it."

I don't let him see the relief I feel that I made the right choice. "Never. All a girl is good for is a couple of hours. But, if anyone touches my sister or her friend they will be answering to me." I look Atom in the face to make sure that he understands the severity of my threat.

"Got it. I'll pass the word around. And you need to loosen up. I think Raven could help out with that." He points to the girl who is glaring at Finn. Atom might be right, but not in the way that he thinks. She's the one person in here that knows exactly how I'm feeling. As much as I hate Finn I know that she loves him.

"Hey, Rav, can we talk?" I yell into her ear to be heard over the music.

"Sure, sugar." She grabs my hand and leads me upstairs. When we get to the hallway there are five doors, but only one is open. We push our way through the crowded hallway to the last room on the left.

"What is it Blake?" The smile drops from her face as she slams the door.

"How are you?" I ask trying to figure out what I actually want to say to her.

"I didn't come up here to exchange small talk. Spit it out, Blake." She taps her fingers on her hip as she stares at me, waiting for me to speak.

"Well, I just wanted to know how it's going with you and the spacewalker?" I finally say.

"You mean, Finn, yeah he's fine. I'm fine." She says in a tight voice.

"Oh. Well, never mind. I've got to go." I try to grab the doorknob but Raven smacks my hand.

"No, we can't leave just yet. Or would you like both of our reputations to be ruined."

Then it hits me. Everyone obviously thinks that we came in here to hook up like I normally would do. Even if I can't fathom the idea of being with Raven this will help get people off my back about Clarke. "Well then I guess we'll be in here a while."

"Looks like it. So, what did you really want to talk about?" She asks after taking a seat on the bed next to me.

"Nothing really, just something stupid." I wave off her question. "Is it hard for you to see him out there with other girls?"

"Of course it is. It kills me, but it's better than both of us ending up dead so we live with it. I mean we _lived _with it." She gives me a sad look. It's a rare moment when Raven shows emotion.

"What do you mean?" I place my hand on hers for comfort.

"He called it quits. It was too much for him I guess. And really it's not like it was fair of me to ask him to give so much up for a relationship that no one could know about."

"He dumped you because you wouldn't make it public?" I ask in shock.

"Yeah, but it's not his fault. He just doesn't get it. He's not a part of this world."

"Do you want me to teach him a lesson about our _world_?" I ask and feel better when I see her smile.

"No, I'll be fine. So, you and Clarke, then?"

"No. I don't even know her. Plus, she's better than this."

"I'd watch my back if I were you. Someone's out to get you and if they even get a whiff of a crush then you'll be done. Don't worry, though. You're secret's safe with me just like mine is with you." She wipes her eyes and voids her face of emotion. Then she sashays out of the room.

"See you later, baby!" She calls back to me as I exit the room. I look down the hallway to see Clarke staring at me. When I take a step towards her she shakes her head and walks back down the stairs.


	14. Rage

I shove people out of my way while trying to get to the stairs. Generally when people see me they practically jump out of the way but the more they drink the less fear they have so it takes a lot longer than I expected to get down the stairs.

"Hey, Bell. Have you seen Clarke? She was looking for you." O steps in front of me and I almost push her over before realizing who it is.

"Yeah, she was just coming down the stairs." I say and look over her head. I catch sight of blonde hair over to the right by the front door. "Talk later, O."

I wade my way through the crowd of dancing, sweaty bodies to the front door. When I get there I reach out to grab her shoulder to stop her. She whips around and I see that it's not Clarke. The girl's face goes from pissed off to sultry in a matter of seconds.

"Hey, Bell. Wanna go upstairs?" She slurs and stumbles against me.

"No, I don't." I push her off of me and let her fall against the wall.

"Wow. That's a first." Murphy is leaning against the other wall and clearly just watched our exchange. Crap! I can't deal with him right now. "Has our great leader finally had enough? Raven was enough?" He asks in a dark voice that only he has.

"I don't waste my time on girls who are so drunk that they can't form their words correctly." I say and glare at him.

"Sure, well I'm going to go find myself some company for the evening. Stay safe Bell. Oh and I sent Clarke upstairs when she asked about you. Did she find you?" He kicks off from the wall and walks to the kitchen. I feel bad for the girl drunk enough to end up alone with him.

"Hey, Atom, have you seen Clarke? O was looking for her." I grab his shoulder even though he's making out with some chick that I can't see. This is more important than him getting a little action.

"Back off man." He smacks my arm without turning around. "I'm busy."

"Bell?" Octavia looks around Atom.

"Bell?" Atom sounds terrified.

"Octavia, Atom? My sister?" I'm already wound so tightly because of Clarke that I can't control my actions what so ever. I pick Atom up by his collar and fling him to the couch. A couple who was making out on it barely jump out of the way.

"Bell, stop!" Octavia grabs my arm but I shake her off.

"I'll deal with you later. We're leaving. Go to the car." I give her a quick glance to show how serious I am. "Atom and I are going to have a little talk."

"Hey, buddy, really nothing has or will happen. She just kissed me and well I'm drunk. I'm sorry." He says while standing. He walks towards me with his hands raised in surrender.

"Get out now." I say through gritted teeth. "Or I won't stop until you're a bloody pulp. Never touch my sister again. Got it?"

"I won't even look at her." He stumbles as he runs backwards to the kitchen.

I hear a piercing scream and look around to see where it came from. No one else even reacts to it. I hear a muffled scream and start walking to the back door which is through the kitchen.

"It's Murphy. He has a girl with him outside. Do you want me to stop him or you?" Miller asks nonchalantly as he leans against the counter sipping a beer.

"I'll get it." I need to blow off some steam anyway and Murphy is just the guy for that.

I step outside and feel the fresh air hit my face. It's very calming and if not for the muffled cries I could have stood there for hours. I leap down the three steps and jog to the woods out back. The cries are getting louder and I hear what sounds like a zipper.

Behind the first bush out back I can see Murphy's head sticking up. I start running and get there in four steps. When I see him I lose it. I rip him off of Clarke and throw him against a tree. Clarke looks up at me with fear in her eyes. I don't stop to see how she is doing. I run to Murphy and slam my fist into his nose. I hear a crack and feel blood ooze onto my hand. I kick him in the side a couple of times and then straddle him. He puts his arms up in an attempt to protect his face but it does no good.

I only stop when his eyes roll back and he goes limp. For a second I think I might have killed him and I'm horrified. I touch my finger to his neck and feel a soft heartbeat. When I do this I see that my hands are covered in blood and not all of it is his.


	15. Thank You?

I wipe my bloody hands off on Murphy's shirt. I'm sure he won't mind and then I turn back to Clarke. She's still sitting on the ground but she looks more angry than scared right now.

"You're going to be okay. Did he hurt you?" I ask in a gentle voice and hold my hand out to help her up.

She ignores my hand and hops up. "I was fine. I had it all under control. I didn't need your help." She says with venom dripping from her words.

I notice a knife in her hand, the one not holding her shirt together. She gives me a sharp look and then tucks it into her back pocket.

"Trust me, princess, I know. But just because you can do something on your own doesn't mean you have to." I try to touch her shoulder to comfort her but she steps back.

"Seriously, I get that you're tough but it's okay to have help every once in awhile."

"No it's not. The only person you can depend on is yourself because in the end that's the only person who will be fighting for you." She says and looks me straight in the eyes with her icy gaze.

This is ridiculous! It pisses me off that she can't just say thanks; that she has to fight me on everything.

"Okay, you know what? Next time someone's hurting you I'll just keep walking. Heck maybe next time I'll just join in. Is that better? Is that what you want to hear?" I throw my hands up I'm anger.

"No." Is all she says.

"Then what, Princess, what do you want?" My voice sounds harsh even to me.

"I just, I don't know." She replies after an eternity of silence. By now it's hit me how mean I'm being. Even if she's being difficult she was just attacked by Murphy. I take a deep breath and try to calm my breathing.

"Look I'm sorry, okay?" I reach out for her arm again and this time she doesn't move away from me. She actually steps into my embrace. I place a silent kiss on the top of her head.

"I'm sorry." She whispers it so quietly that I'm not sure if she actually said it or it's just my imagination.

"Hey Bell? You might want to get in here. It's Octavia." Raven calls from the porch.


	16. Octavia

I look at Clarke and she has worry in her eyes. We both take off running to the house. When we get inside there are loud cheers coming from the living room. I push and pull people to get them out of my way. When they see that it's me they all jump out of the way and stop shouting. I can feel Clarke's hand on my elbow as she struggles to stay with me. There are more people than earlier.

I get to the living room to see Harper and Sterling on the coffee table dancing. I can't see Octavia, but when I see Raven she motions with her head to behind the table. I step around the table and a couple of guys who are too drunk to be smart yell at me for blocking their view of the girls on the table. Clarke's hand that's still on my arm is the only thing that keeps me from pummeling them.

"Octavia?" Clarke says and kneels behind the table.

I see O lying there completely still and my throat constricts. I can't breathe. This can't be happening. I was away from her for maybe ten minutes, I look at my watch and realize that it's been longer. Crap! What was I thinking? I have failed her. I just had to go looking for Clarke. I should have stayed with O.

"She's breathing. I think she just passed out." Clarke's voice calms me. She looks up at me and grabs my hand. "She'll be okay, Bell."

"She better be." I turn to the crowd who is now silently watching me. "What happened?"

"She was like dancing on the table up her with us, but she like jumped or something and hit her head. Then she totally messed our dance up because she just fell off the table." Lorelei says from on the table next to Harper. I have never wanted to hit a girl so much as I do right now.

"And you didn't think to see if she was okay? None of you even thought to check on her?" I look around and am at least glad that not a single person can look me in the eyes.

"Well, I'm pretty sure she would have told us if she weren't okay." Lorelei says in her whiny voice.

"She's unconscious!" I step forward so that my face is flush with hers. She scrambles back so quickly that she falls of the table. No one laughs when she lands on her butt and whimpers.

I lift Octavia into my arms and walk to the door. Raven opens the door to let me out.

"Thank you for getting me." I tell her.

"No worries, Bell. What are friends for? Let me know how she's doing, okay?" She brushes some hair off of Octavia's face.

"I will. Talk to you later, Rav." I walk outside and can feel Clarke still with me. I look over my shoulder and see her standing tall as we walk to my car.

"Is it okay if I come with you? I kind of already planned to stay the night and now I really don't want to leave Octavia." She says and tucks some loose hair behind her ear.

"Of course. I could use your help." At that exact moment Octavia opens her eyes and hurls. It gets all over me. She closes her eyes again and I can feel her body still convulsing, trying to get the alcohol out of her system. She definitely had more than one beer.

"Do you want to sit in the back with her? I can drive." Clarke offers.

"Sure. Thanks." I drop my keys into her pocket and ignore the gross feeling of having vomit on me as I crawl into the back of the car. Clarke starts the car, checks, and then double checks the mirrors. Wait? Is she drunk? Should she be driving?

"Are you okay to drive?" I ask her.

"Yes, don't worry. I don't drink, at least often. I didn't even have a soda while we were here." She puts the car into reverse and shoots out of the driveway. When we hit the street she twists the wheel and turns the 90 degree turn so quickly that it makes me feel sick.

"Sorry, I guess I should drive more carefully." She gives me a nervous smile and laughs.

"Yeah, let's just stick to the soccer mom drive, not a cop show." I laugh with her.

"So, I think Octavia has a mild concussion so we should make sure to wake her every two hours or so. If she gets worse then we will need to take her to the hospital, but I've had a concussion before and I was fine by the next morning."

"Good to know. How do you know this?" I ask her.

"My mom's a doctor. Where do I turn?" She follows the directions I give her until she is pulling into our driveway.

Clarke hops out of the car after turning it off and opens my door so I can get out with Octavia still in my arms. She flips through my keys to find the house key. When she gets it she unlocks the door and opens it for me.

"I think I'm just going to take her to the bathroom, we can make the tub into a bed for her. Then when she gets sick again it's less of a mess." I say and lead the way to the bathroom.

"I'll grab some blankets if you can tell me where they are." Clarke offers.

"Sure thanks. They're in the closet down the hall. We can use some green ones. They're old."

After she has left I set Octavia down against the wall and strip off my soiled shirt, pants, and shoes. I'm so glad that I had left my jacket in my car.

"I found the blankets-" Clarke freezes in the doorway. Her face is bright red. Her eyes are huge and almost black from how big her pupils have grown."Sorry, I didn't know you were changing. I'll leave."

"Wait, Princess, I just had to take off my shirt and pants. It's not like I'm naked. Can you help me get her in the tub?" I ask and love watching the wheels turning in her mind. She finally steps into the bathroom.


	17. The Storm is Rising

I watch Clarke with hungry eyes as she walks into the enclosed space and suddenly it feels like I'm in a sauna. I instantly regret my decision. I should have just run and grabbed some sweats or something. Clarke doesn't look at me when she kneels next to my sleeping sister.

"Hey, sweetie. I know you're not feeling great but I need you to wake up." She brushes her hand through Octavia's hair.

"Hurmph," Octavia moans and turns away from her.

"Bell, why don't you go and grab some clothes for her? I'll get her cleaned up." Clarke says still without looking.

"Yeah, okay." I step around her and purposefully let my hand caress her shoulder. I hear a slight intake of breath from her and a smile breaks out on my face.

I quietly pull the door closed to give them privacy, but I don't close it all the way just in case Clarke needs something. I stand in the hallway and listen to her with my sister for a minute and I feel like my heart is going to explode.

"Sweetie, I'm going to help you get undressed so I can clean you off, okay?" Her voice is so soothing it's not hard to get caught listening to it. I feel myself relaxing, leaning against the wall. I close my eyes and imagine I'm the one who she's talking to. I'm the one she is undressing.

Woah! Back up. I tell myself. I need to go or we're both going to be in trouble.

I walk into O's room and see a bag next to her bed that isn't hers. It must be Clarke's I'm itching to look in it to see if it holds the secrets of who this girl is. How can one girl be so kind and gentle with my sister right after having a knife out ready to hurt someone.

I open O's dresser and find a pair of sweats and a tank top. That should be good enough. I want to bring Clarke something to change into too, but I don't think she'd like me going through her bag so I decide to grab a pair of sweats and a shirt from my room for her. I purposefully choose my favorite shirt so that when she's gone I can remember her. I also pull on a pair of sweats.

I hear some splashing and groans coming from the bathroom so I wait.

"Okay, sweetie. We're almost finished. I just need you to stay awake for a little longer and then you can sleep." Clarke's voice calms the storm yet again.

"Bell, can you hand me the clothes please?" Clarke asks after cracking the door open a little more. She is soaked and I can't hold back a chuckle.

"Thank you." She smiles and takes the clothes for Octavia. After a couple of minutes she opens the door again. "I think she's thrown up everything so she'll actually be okay on her bed. Can you help me get her there?"

"Yeah, we can just lay the green blankets on top of her bed so if she does get sick it'll be on those." I lean down to pick up O and see that her hair has been braided. Clarke must have done it.

Octavia opens her eyes. "Sorry, Bell."

"Don't worry about it right now. We'll talk in the morning." I say and walk out of the bathroom with Clarke ahead of us.

She quickly spreads out a green blanket to cover Octavia's bed and then I lay her down.

"Turn her onto her side. Just in case something happens." Clarke says and after I've shifted her she lays another blanket over O.

We both walk out of the room and pull the door just enough so we won't disturb her.

"Thank you Clarke for helping. I don't know what I would have done." I say honestly.

"You would have been fine, I'm sure." She says and pushes back some wet hair out of her face.

"Here, why don't you go get cleaned up and I'll make us something to eat." I offer and pick up the discarded clothes I brought for her. "I hope these are okay."

"Yes, thank you." She steps into the bathroom and closes the door.

Once she's inside I run to my room to my bathroom and take the fastest shower I've ever taken and don't bother with drying off before pulling on a pair of sweats. My hair is still dripping wet when I get into the kitchen.

I open the fridge and pull out some eggs and other things that I'll need to make omelets. I'm just flipping the last one when I hear Clarke's bare feet hit the linoleum in the kitchen. I turn around to see her and almost drop the pan. She looks even better than I imagined she would. She's in my green shirt that barely covers down to her mid thighs. She gives me a sultry smile.

"Normally aren't guys supposed to make breakfast after they get what they want?" She asks in a husky voice.

"What?" My mind goes completely blank. Is this actually happening?


	18. Close Your Eyes For This Kids

**Haha! Something might just be happening in this chapter… But don't worry it won't be graphic or anything, if you want that then I will let your imagination take over ****J**

**Heaven in our headlights – Hedley is the song that I think of when I think of them.**

"Oh my gosh! Is that bacon? And omelets! You are a godsend!" She rushes forward and wraps her arms around me.

I don't exactly know what to do with my hands because I'm pretty sure if I wrap them around her I'll never let go and I really don't want to scare her away. Then again maybe it's my turn to mess with her.

I let my arms wrap around her waist as hers are already around my shoulders. I start to move my hands in slow circles on her back and hear her sharp intake of breath as I pull her even closer. I look down and see her eyes on me. They shift between my eyes and lips. I lean down but before anything can happen she steps back.

"So is one of those for me?" She asks in a slightly husky voice.

"Yeah, I hope you like sausage, bacon, and cheese. O usually puts green stuff in it but I wasn't sure what you liked. In fact I don't really know much about you."

"Ditto. How about we play truth while we eat?" She offers.

"Truth?" I cringe it definitely sounds like a chick game and the whole honesty thing is hard with my particular job.

"Yeah, it's where we go back and forth asking each other questions. You have to answer honestly, if you're caught in a lie you lose."

"What if I don't want to answer a question?"

"Then you can pass and you ask me a question. If I answer it then I win. If I chose not to then we keep going. It's easy. Come on. Please, Bell." She bats her eyelashes and puffs her bottom lip out. There is no possible way I could say no to her right now.

"Okay, I get to go first." I'm not ready for her to ask me a question.

"What's your favorite breakfast food?" I ask as I set a plate in front of her and sit down with my own.

"I love crepes; especially ones filled with strawberries, chocolate, and whipped cream." She licks her lips.

"What is your middle name?"

"Don't have one."

"Really?"

"Yes, at least that I know of." I shrug my shoulders.

"What's your favorite color?"

"Usually it's blue, but right now I've got to say chocolate brown." She meets my gaze with her ocean filled eyes.

We continue to play asking relatively easy questions. We've long since finished eating and I take our dishes to set them in the sink to deal with in the morning.

"Do you want to go sit on the couch?" I ask her.

"Yeah, let me go check on Octavia real quick first." When she says this it hits me that I had completely forgotten about my own sister. All I cared about was Clarke, her answers, and what different things made her laugh.

"Okay, ready for the real questions?" She leaps over the back of the couch to land on her knees. Her shirt flips up and I'd like to say that I was a gentleman, but I wasn't, I looked.

"I don't know, are you?" I smirk and take a seat next to her. I turn my body so that I'm facing her.

"How many girls have to brought home with you?" She blurts out and at least has the decency to blush.

"Seriously?"

"Yes, or would you like to pass?" She gives me an innocent smile.

"Fine. None."

Her mouth drops open in shock. "None?"

"Correct. Now how many guys have you brought home?"

"Two, for dinner and then I dumped them. How have you never brought any girl home? What about Raven?"

"That's two questions. Which would you like me to answer?"

"Both. You can have two next turn."

"Okay. I don't bring girls to my house because I like to leave as soon as I can. If they were here I couldn't leave. And Raven is one of my best friends. Nothing more than a drunk kiss when she was fifteen has ever happened."

Relief floods her face. "So tonight?"

"Nothing. We just don't want people to exactly know that we're friends it's complicated. So that makes three questions I think. First, would you be okay with me pushing the hair out of your face?"

"Yes?" She blushes and shifts so that there is a curtain of blonde hair between us.

I slide my finger behind it and gently tuck it behind her ear. While doing it I let my finger slide across her cheek.

"Good because I love being able to see your eyes. What would you do if I kissed you?" I hold my breath waiting for her answer.

"Do it and find out." She looks up into my eyes again and she is all I see.

I scoot closer to her and she scoots even closer, still on her knees so that our legs are touching. I sit up taller and she leans down. It's weird having her taller than me. I slide my hand behind her neck and pull her to me. Her mouth is like a fire and I'm dry wood. I use my other hand to pull her on top of me. Her knees are on either side of my thighs as she straddles me. Her hands are in my hair and for once I don't want to just hurry and get it over with. I want to relish every moment. When her hands drop away from me I groan.

She laughs against my lips. "Sorry, I was falling."

"Here." I flip us over so that she's lying back on the couch and I'm on top of her. I hold myself up with my elbows so as not to crush her.

"Ow!" She squeals as her heel hits the edge of the couch. She starts to laugh again. "Bell, I don't think this is going to work."

"Princess?" I ask without any other words and she just leans forward to kiss me again. Her lips move down my neck to my shoulder blade. Her lips feel heavenly against my bare skin. I pick her up and walk to my room. When we get inside I kick the door shut and drop to my bed with her still in my arms.


	19. I Think

I wake up feeling more rested than I have in years. I can feel Clarke rolled up next to me. Her leg is tangled between mine and my arm is wrapped around her so tightly that when I shift my hand goes tingly. Before I can roll over she snuggles up closer and I hear her breathing soften.

She is now facing me and there is just a curtain of hair blocking her face from my view. I sit up on my elbow and push the hair away from her face. She looks so peaceful that I don't want to wake her. I lie back down on my side and watch her sleep. I'm not sure how long this goes on, but I know that this is the first time I've ever even fallen asleep with a girl, let alone stayed.

"Daddy?" She murmurs in her sleep. Then her face contorts with fear. She starts to kick her legs ever so gently and her hand that's back on my arm squeezes shut. Her eyes shoot open and she looks even more terrified. I can tell that even though her eyes are open she's not seeing anything. They snap shut and she moves away from me. The sheets get twisted around her and she struggles against them.

"No, please." She cries out and I see tears falling from her eyes as she turns again.

I don't know what to do so I let instinct take over. I wrap my arms around her, tangled sheets and all, and pull her on top of me. I sit up and lean against the wall. I gently start to rock her in my arms.

"Shh… Princess. You're safe. Just sleep." I whisper into her ear and kiss her forehead, her eye lids, and then her cheek. "Princess, I will always keep you safe."

She starts to calm down and stops shaking. I wipe the tears from her cheeks and settle back against the pillow. I slowly let us slide back down so that we're lying down again.

"Bell…" She breathes before her breathing evens out again.

Hearing my name on her lips while I'm holding her makes me feel something I've never felt before. "I think I might be falling for you, Princess. Just please don't break my heart."

**A/N Hey, sorry it's a shorter chapter. I just thought it would be nice to end on a happy note again. Don't worry more drama and action is on the way! Thanks for reading and reviewing!**


	20. Waking Up

I wake slowly and peacefully. I can feel the sunlight on my face and I don't want to open my eyes. Clarke had rolled over at some point in the night so the weight of her on top of me is gone. I want it back. She is the first girl for me. The first one that I've let in my room, the first that I've fallen asleep with and I fell asleep twice with her.

"Morning." I say as I stretch my arms far above my head. I slowly peel my eyes open and look to my left to see the bed is empty. "Clarke!" I call out and don't hear her respond.

Did she leave? She wouldn't leave would she? Didn't this mean something to her too?

I bolt up and pull the covers off of me. I reach down and snag my sweats from the edge of the bed. I step into them and comb my hand through my hair. When I get to my door I hear water running.

She's in the shower you idiot. Gosh, you need to calm down. The voice in my head says. No, there's a reason you thought that. There's a reason you were so hurt when you thought she left. Yeah, you've gone soft. If anyone finds out then you'll never get out of this town and you'll both be in danger.

I shuffle to Octavia's room to check on her. I can't believe how irresponsible I was last night. I tap on her door and it swings open. The green blankets are on her bed still but Octavia is gone.

Are they both in the bathroom or did one of them leave? Who is gone? I can't decide who I want to be here more and that's more than troubling.

"O?" I call as I knock on the bathroom door. "Clarke?"

"It's me Bell. I'll be out in a sec. We need to talk." Because of the spray of the water I can't tell if the voice is O's or Clarke's. Either way "we need to talk" is never a good sign.

"Okay, hurry up." I knock on the door a final time to show my urgency and go to the kitchen to get a glass of water. I grab a cup and go to the sink to fill it. When I turn the water on it hits our plates from the night before and it all hits me again.

_We're in my bed and she's lying half on top of me. She is making slow circles with her fingers on my chest. Her hair has fallen in front of her face again and it tickles where it touches me. _

_"__We have got to do something about your hair." I say in a husky voice as I reach my arm around her back to pull her hair back. I leave my hand there holding her hair and let my other hand go up to her cheek. _

_"__I like it long, don't you?" She flirts and meets my gaze._

_"__I love it, but I don't love when it blocks my sight of you. And when it's down I can't do this." I lean forward to kiss her nose, then her eyelids, and finally I meet her lips again. You'd think I'd be tired of her like any other girl, but I want her just as much._

_She giggles and says my name as if it were a prayer._

"Bell. Are you even listening to me? Gosh. You are ridiculous!" Octavia is practically shouting. I shake my head to clear it of the things I shouldn't be thinking about right now. My heart sinks when I see only O. That means Clarke really is gone. She left.

"O? Where's Clarke?" I demand.

"That's what I've been asking you. She came into my room to check on me and then said she had to go. She looked really upset, Bell. What did you do?" She glares at me.

"Nothing." I hold my hands up.

"Come on, Bell, we both know you're more devil than saint. You obviously did something to her. You always do something." She stabs me with her finger while yelling at me.

"No, seriously. I…" She regrets what happened last night. She left because of me. O is right.

"Oh are you thinking of something? Because I know something happened between you too. I know: shocking!"

I open my mouth to explain what happened but O's raised hand stops me.

"Don't even bother lying she was wearing your shirt, Bell."

"I'm sorry, O. I'll fix it." My mind shoots to the diner. "I think I might know where she went."


	21. Running

"Well what are you waiting for? Go!" O waves her hand at the door and raises her eyebrows at me.

"Sorry, I thought were going to yell at me more." I say while pulling my jacket on without a shirt. I zip it up and step into my boots.

"I will if you don't hurry your butt up." She calls out as I run out the door.

I jump onto my motorcycle without a second look at her and I kick my foot down to start it. It purrs to life and I flip a wheelie when I turn out of the driveway. The front tire slams down to the asphalt as I head to the diner. Luckily there aren't many people out and about in town so I don't even waste my time stopping at the red light or stop signs. When I get to the diner I kill the engine and slam the kickstand down. I don't even wait to see if it's still upright before sprinting into the diner. I see Indra, as always sitting behind the counter.

"Hey baby, what are you doing here on a Saturday so late? Your friends are already over there in the usual spot make the usual mess." She says with her hands on her hips.

I duck down when I hear that they're all here. I can't believe I forgot about our Saturday morning tradition. If they see me I know it'll be hard to get away so I stay hidden behind the wood paneling at the front.

"Sorry, I'm actually not here to see them." I whisper.

"Oh, are you here to see Clarke?" She gives me a look of sheer relief.

"Kind of, yeah. She, um," crap! I didn't even come up with a cover story. I'm an idiot. "She left her phone at my place after she helped me get O home." I add lamely.

"Don't worry, baby, your secret is safe with me." She winks. "By the way I haven't seen her today. It's the first time. I was actually worried, but now that I know that she was with _Octavia _I know she's fine." She winks again when she say O's name to let me know that she knows who she really was with. "Good luck, baby."

"Thanks." I turn around, still crouched down and sneak to the door. Just when my hand touches the door handle a hand drops to my shoulder and I am yanked back.

"Ah, there he is! Our fearless leader was trying to sneak away. Ha!" Murphy says as I turn around to face him. As soon as my eyes meet his he drops his hand and I see him swallow.

"Murphy? Didn't I teach you enough of a lesson last night?" I bark at him. I find great joy in seeing his nose bandaged and that he has two black eyes. His bottom lip is swollen and busted and his cheek has a long gash on it.

"That wasn't a fair fight and you know it. If it were fair you'd be in the hospital eating through a straw." He hisses in a low voice.

I pull back my fist and swing it into his gut. He folds over grabbing his stomach.

"This isn't over." He says through gritted teeth.

I ignore him and leave the diner. I hop back on my bike and it reeves to life. Where else would she be? I realize that I don't even know where she lives. I've never even seen her leaving or coming to the diner so I don't even have a direction to head in. I pull out my phone and call O.

"Hey, sis. She wasn't where I thought she'd be. Do you know where she lives?" I say in one breath.

"Yeah, it's just North of the diner, down Mountain Street. It's the third house on the left."

I don't bother thanking her. I just pull out towards her house. When I see the house I kill the engine again and drop my bike onto the grass. Within seconds I've leapt over the porch railing and am knocking on the door.

An older woman comes to the door and looks surprised to see me. She gives me a once over and I know that she doesn't think highly of me. Granted I'm in sweats, a leather jacket, and untied boots. I wouldn't think much of myself either.

"Can I help you?" She asks in a cold voice.


	22. Spitting Coffee

"Hi, you must be Mrs. Griffin. I'm a," I pause for just a second, "friend of Clarke's."

"Are you the reason that she came home sobbing this morning?" She reaches behind her back just like I saw Clarke do when she was slipping that knife into her pocket.

Clarke was crying? What did I do? Was she really so upset about what happened? Did I hurt her? My mind spirals out of control thinking of all of the things that I could have done to make her cry.

"I'll take your silence as a yes, then." Mrs. Griffin looks down at me. "Why don't you come in so we can have a little chat?"

She opens the door wider and motions with her hand to welcome me into their home. Of course I have never felt less welcomed to enter a place. I want to just turn around and bolt, but I know Clarke is here and I can't leave before I know what happened. I take a deep breath and then step inside.

"Go ahead and take a seat and I'll grab us some coffee." She saunters out of the room leaving me alone. I expected to see pictures of Clarke and her parents on the walls and other homely touches but the walls are empty except for a dart board that has three knifes sticking out of it. They're all stuck into the bullseye.

Once again I am hit with the question: who is this girl?

"Cream or sugar?" Mrs. Griffin asks with a smile plastered on her face. This version of her is scarier than the one that answered the door. At least with her I knew that she was pissed.

"No, thanks." I want to ask for some cinnamon because I always have it in my coffee but I decide to not push my luck.

"So, you and my daughter? I'm assuming she was in your bed last night." She says after taking a sip of her coffee.

The coffee shoots out of my mouth when I choke. I wasn't expecting her to be so blunt. And so much for keeping this on the down low. I am reminded why I have chosen to not be the guy that girls bring home to their parents. I have no idea what to do.

"Mom, that is none of your business." Clarke says as she steps out of the hallway. My heart constricts with happiness at seeing her. Her hair is tied up in a messy bun and she still has my shirt on. I want to run to her and wrap my arms around her. Instead I sit on the couch frozen.

"You better watch it missy." Mrs. Griffin turns to her daughter.

"Or what you'll get me arrested? I need to get some air." She then looks at me and raises an eyebrow. "Are you coming or not?"

I look from her to her mom and don't know what to do. I can tell that her mom is hurting, but at the same time Clarke looks broken. The redness around her eyes tells me that she really has been crying. I nod my apology at Mrs. Griffin and walk outside behind Clarke.

"You can leave now." Clarke says and looks away from me. She starts walking down the sidewalk away from me.

"Wait! Aren't you coming with me?" I ask thoroughly confused. She definitely asked if I was coming or not.

"I just said that to piss her off." She doesn't even look back; just keeps walking.

I catch up to her easily and grab her arm. "No, you don't get to just walk away. If you want to go somewhere let me at least give you a ride."

She twists her arm to make me let go. She turns around and looks up at me with sad eyes. I can see the tears welling inside them. I want to hug her but I don't think I could handle the rejection of her pushing me away.

"Bell, look last night was fun, but that's all it was." She says with a blank expression.

_Fun? She thinks it was fun; just fun. I feel my heart begin to snap._

"You even said yourself that you like to leave. So, leave. I don't need you anymore. I got what I wanted and you got what you wanted. That's all it was about." She continues to stab the dagger into my heart then she turns on her heel and walks away.

I feel a choking in my throat and start to cough to get rid of it. It feels like there is a frog in it. I feel something on my cheek so I reach up and my finger hits the first tear I've cried since I was 7 years old. All because of a girl who did exactly what I usually do. A girl that I barely know. The first girl that I didn't want to leave.

_What are you going to do Bellamy? Are you going to be a coward who stands on the sidewalk, crying while she leaves you or are you going to suck it up, jump on your bike, and stop her?_


	23. Stop

By the time I have pulled myself out of my stupor I can see Clarke turning the corner all the way at the end of the street. I could run after her, but instead I jog to my bike, pick it up, and jump on. I peel out of their driveway and race to stop her. If she's going to leave me I dang well better know why and I know it was more than just _fun _last night.

If she thinks she's going to get away from me that easy, she has another thing coming.

I know I'm speeding and driving like a madman, but when I see her just up ahead it's worth it. I pull my bike in front of her to cut her off. She jumps back and yelps. I can see tears streaming down her face and my heart breaks just a little more.

"What do you want, Bell. I thought you understood." She sniffles.

"I understand that you're trying to push me away and that it's a mistake." I lean my bike on the kickstand and get off slowly. I approach her like you would a feral lion.

"It's a mistake? Ha! You don't even know me? Or do you think it's a mistake because it's you I'm leaving. You're too good for someone to leave? Is that it? Only you can leave people?" She spits at me in a harsh voice.

"No. I know it's a mistake because I do it."

"So, leaving is your thing? I didn't see it trademarked. Sorry, I guess I'll have to come up with another word for it then. What-"

I can't take her anger anymore so I do what I really shouldn't do at this moment in the middle of the sidewalk. I reach out to grab her and tug on her arms to make her fall forward. Her hands instinctively go to my chest to stop her fall.

I lean forward and kiss her. This kiss is unlike any other I've ever had. It's filled with bitter rage, and fiery anger. It's a punishment. She bites my lip just hard enough to cause me to moan. I nip at her tongue when it plunges into my mouth. It's a battle that neither of us can win.

Her hands that are still on my chest flex around the collar of my jacket and start to push me back. I get the message even through the haze in my mind and start to pull back.

"No."

The single word changes everything. She yanks me back to her and one of her hands slips into my jacket by my collar. It moves up to my hair. She pulls on it ever so slightly, just enough to make me feel even crazier. My hands are still on either side of her face, but I let go just to grab her waist. I let my hands slide down to her hips and lift her up. Her legs wrap around me and her other hand slips inside my jacket to rake against my chest. I know I'll have marks but I don't care.

Somewhere along the lines our kiss has become less like a battle and more like a dance. Our tongues swirl in rhythm and there is hardly any space left between us.

She giggles when my hand starts to slide up and down on her thigh. I keep doing it because her giggle is the most beautiful sound I've ever heard.

"Stop." She giggles against my lips. She lowers one hand to grab mine.

"Ticklish, Princess?"

A horn honking in the distance shatters everything. I drop Clarke to the ground and she looks at me wide eyed. We're both breathing so hard that we can't speak.


	24. The Watch

I can tell from the look in her eyes that this is more than just a watch to her. And I didn't miss that fact that she almost said dad. I want to ask what happened to him but I don't want to ruin the moment so I stay quiet. If she wanted to talk about him she'd say so right?

"Sure, get on and we'll grab it on our way to my secret hideaway." I say and wiggle my eyebrows at her.

"You're such a dork." She smacks my arm and I'm happy to see the smile back on her face.

"You should always smile. It makes you even more beautiful. In fact we might need to stop somewhere before we get your watch." I wink at her from my bike. She's leaning against me and has the hand she smacked me with on my arm to hold her up.

"Bell…" She says in warning.

"Fine. Watch first; then we'll have some _fun."_ I say using her own word to explain last night.

"Whatever. Can we just go?" Her eyes twinkle with humor.

"You're the one standing on the sidewalk." I laugh.

"Technically, I'm leaning." She pushes off of me and gets on the back of my bike.

Her legs squeeze against mine and I realize that I should have driven the car. Her arms slowly wrap around me, of course it's probably only slow to me because I am so hyper-aware of it. Her head rests against my shoulder blade and I feel her breath on my ear.

"Ready to go?" She whispers and I know I'm nowhere near ready.

"Are you?" I ask and rev the engine.

She just squeezes me tighter with her arms and legs. I take off like a bullet down the street. She laughs against me and lets out a "Woohoo!" I am so happy that I've never let a girl ride on my bike before. This is something that I want to remember this forever. I may not be in love and she'll probably leave me, but I will always have this moment.

We get to the house in no time. I almost want to just ride past it because I don't want Clarke to let go, but I know that this stop is important. I park on the street just by the rusted mailbox at the front of the house.

"Do you have any idea where it might have fallen off?" I ask her after we get off.

"The only place I can think is in the back." She doesn't make eye contact with me and instead just walks up the side of the house.

I take big steps so that I can catch up with her quickly and then match her steps. We walk around to the back of the house in silence. The backyard is pretty big and like a meadow in the middle of a forest. There are trees on three of the four sides and the fourth side is blocked by the house. We walk to the edge of the trees and I pale.

I can see dried blood on the grass and broken branches. I flash back to the night before when I found her and Murphy. I want to beat the crap out of him all over again. My fists clench tightly and I try to calm my racing heart.

I freeze when I feel a soft hand wrap around my hard one. I look to my side and see Clarke looking at me with her sapphire eyes.

"I'm okay, Bell. He really wouldn't have been able to hurt me. I'm tougher then you think."

"I know. It's just I can't get the image out of my mind. Every time I come here now that's all I'll see."

"Then find another one to focus on, Bell. Imagine it being you with me." She changes the subject before I can respond. "Now, help me find that watch so we can go. I don't like being here either."

I look down and see something reflected the sunlight. I bend down and pick up the watch. It definitely looks too masculine for her. Once again I'm hit with the urge to ask her about her dad, but like before I stay quiet. Her eyes light up when she sees that I've found it.

"Thanks." She holds out her wrist and I snap it into place.

"Bellamy, is that you?" Kennedy asks and I drop my hands from Clarke's wrist. Kennedy is not only Nyko's daughter; she's also the one girl that I've ever been with for more than a couple hours. Sure, it meant nothing to me, but she still hasn't moved on exactly. Mostly because her father has already decided that we're supposed to be together and what Nyko says, Nyko gets.


	25. Kennedy

I look from Clarke to Kennedy and then back to Clarke. Neither of them looks very happy, but I know right now I have to choose Kennedy. If she's not happy then we're all in trouble. I put my hand on Clarke's arm at her elbow.

"Hey, do you mind giving us a minute?" I ask her.

"No worries. I'll just be upfront." She walks away and I have to fight every bone in my body from chasing after her.

I look back to Kennedy and plaster a smirk on my face. She is dressed in what can only be called a shirt. She's wearing it as a dress, but when she turns to lead the way inside I can see half of her butt. I can't believe that I actually used to enjoy seeing her dressed like this. I was an idiot. That's something about Clarke that stood out to me. It's not that my views have changed because of her, but that they changed and I finally found a girl that fits.

"What do you want, Ken?" I say knowing that she hates that nickname.

"Do you want a drink?" She asks while reaching up for a glass from the top shelf in the cupboard. When she does this the shirt rides up, but before I see more I look away.

"No, Ken. I am busy so tell me what you need." I have zero patience for her.

"Well, I saw you and that blonde bimbo leave together last night." She pauses as if waiting for me to deny what she says.

"Her name is Clarke and yes, she helped me get O home after she got hurt." I push the glass filled with bourbon away from me on the counter after Kennedy shoves it into my hand.

"Right." She downs the alcohol in one gulp. "And now you brought the skank back to my house on your precious motorcycle. I thought girls weren't allowed on your bike."

"Her name is Clarke. I'm not going to remind you again. And most girls aren't allowed on it." I answer honestly.

"So, why her? Are the rumors true?"

"You'd have to fill me on what the rumors are. I don't waste my time listening to you girls gab about each other."

"There's a rumor going around that you've gone soft; that this new girl is making you weak. Seeing her on your bike I can see why they think that."

"It's not like that. She helped me with O so I helped her. You for one should know that I don't like owing people favors."

"Then can I have a ride later?" She slides her candy red nail down my chest. If I were less of a gentleman I would snap that hooker finger of hers.

"No."

"Why not?" She pouts.

I know what I want to say and what I will say are too different things. In my head I tell her because I don't want trash on my bike but out loud I lie through my teeth.

"I care about you too much. I would hate for you to get hurt and my motorcycle isn't the safest thing. As for Clarke I couldn't care less what happens to her." I look out the window that I now realize is open and see blonde hair just outside. I know it is Clarke. Did she hear what I said? Please tell me she didn't.

"Aren't you a sweetheart?" Kennedy leans forward to give me a sloppy kiss on the lips. I bite her lip to get her to pull back. She touches her lip and winks at me. "I forgot how feisty you were. I like it."

"Bye, Kennedy. I'll see you at the family dinner tomorrow." I walk out to the front door and walk outside to see Clarke walking around from the side of the house.

So she did hear everything. At least she didn't see the kiss, right?

"How long have you and Kennedy been a thing?" She asks after hopping onto my bike behind me.

"It's complicated." I say and then start the engine.

"I'm sure it is what with her thinking you've gone soft for a _blonde skank_ and all." She says into my ear.

**A/N thanks for reading, following, and reviewing. Just so you know I will be out of town all next week so I probably won't be able to update until next Tuesday, possibly Monday night. **


	26. Bipolar Much?

"Don't listen to her. She's a spoiled brat. If she's not getting all of the attention then she makes it so no one else will." I grab her hand that's around my waist.

"Don't worry. I grew up with girls like her. She's just like my ex's sister." She responds as I pull away from the curb.

I know it's crazy but just the thought of her having an ex makes me want to find the guy and strangle him. As I'm driving I start to relax only from the feel of her thighs squeezing my legs tight and her hands splayed out on my stomach. She says something but I can't hear her over the roar of the engine so I just brush it off. Then she squeezes me tighter and releases her right arm to grab mine. When she yanks on my arm I'm not expecting it so we turn too fast. My leg shoots down to catch us and I turn to the left hard. I barely catch us before we go skidding.

When I steady us I pull to the side of the road and turn to look at Clarke.

"What the heck was that? Are you trying to get us killed?" I yell at her.

"No. I was trying to tell you that you missed the turn to my house."

"We're not going there. We need to talk so we're going to my place." I give her a look just daring her to fight me on this.

She does. "No, I need to go home. I just needed to get my watch. We have nothing to talk about."

"Like hell we do." I laugh. "Why are you doing this? You're acting bipolar."

"If you think I'm crazy-"

Before she can finish what she's saying I take off again. I hold tight to her arm so that when we pop a wheelie she doesn't fall. She hits my arm with her free hand trying to get me to let go, but I hold tight and continue to speed to my place. It's a small cabin out in the woods away from everything else. No one knows about it; not even O.

After a good minute of getting hit Clarke finally stops and leans against me. I can feel her breath hot on my neck and I have to use all of my energy to keep driving. All I want to do is pull over and remind myself of just how hot she is. But, we can't. I need to figure out why she left crying.

We pull up to small trail that leads to my cabin. I rest my bike against the kickstand and wait for Clarke to get off.

"I can't believe you! You know this is kidnapping, right?" She throws the helmet on the ground and stands with her hands on her hips. She is fuming, I almost expect to see smoke coming out her ears.

"You can go if you want." I motion to the multitude of trees surrounding us. "Any direction and you can find your way home.

"Good." She starts to stomp off towards where we came in from.

"Ah! Not yet, though." I grab her arm. "First, tell me why you left crying."

"It's none of your business, Bell. Let go of me or I'll make you let go." There is malice in her eyes and I'm actually a little scared.

I laugh at her knowing that it'll make her even angrier. I've noticed that when O gets angry if I make it worse then she blows up and can actually calm down. I hope Clarke is the same way. "Go ahead and try, Princess. Do your worst."

Before I can even bat an eyelash I am flying through the air. I land on my back hard and groan. So maybe she's not like O. I might have just made the biggest mistake of my life.

"Don't touch me again." She growls. She is leaning down so far that I can see right down her shirt, but I know that this isn't the time to tell her that.

"Princess, I bet I can make you change your mind." I say as I sit up.

"Bell, I mean it. Last night was great, but that can't happen again." She has a sad look on her face again. How does she change moods so quickly? Maybe she really is bipolar.

"Clarke, just tell me why you were so upset and I'll leave you alone. I promise."

"Fine. Get up. You better have some coffee where you're taking me." She holds out a hand to help me up. I decide to ignore it seeing how my back is still throbbing from the last time I touched her.

"I can make some." I brush the dirt off of me and lead the way to my cabin. When we get there I let her go in first and then close the door behind us. It's now that I realize how small this place is. There's a futon, a tiny table with one chair, and a box that has some clothes and other supplies in it. There are a couple five-gallon bottles of water in the corner.

I walk over to the table and grab the kettle off of it. I fill it with water. "We can warm the water up over a fire outside."

"This place is so peaceful." Clarke whispers in a sort of reverence and I watch the stress and anger melt out of her. Maybe, just maybe we'll be able to figure this out.

"Yeah, I like it." I say while staring straight at her. We both know that I'm not talking about the cabin right now. "So, why did you run?"

"You're going to think I'm crazy." She blushes.

"I already do so just tell me." I give her my most charming smile and take a seat on a log by the fire that I just started.


	27. Help Me Forget

"I can't tell you everything, but I can kind of explain why I was upset." She says; beating around the bush.

"Just please, Princess, spit it out. It's driving me crazy. I just need to know what I did wrong so I can fix it." I turn to face her and grab her hand in mine.

"Bell, that's the thing. It's not you…" She blushes.

"For the love! Don't you dare say it's not you, it's me." I give her a mock, angry look.

"Well it's true. I know it sounds ridiculous, but that's all I can say. I'm dealing with some serious stuff and I don't have room for anything else. You're great, really. I wouldn't have let last night happen if you weren't, but I also can't let it happen again. I won't be harsh enough to say it was a mistake, but it shouldn't have happened. I realized that when I woke up and my watch was gone."

"Wait, this is all about a freaking watch?" I spit out. I have never been rejected let alone, over a piece of cheap metal.

"It's not just a watch. It's the only part of home that I have with me. It was my dad's. He gave it to me before, before," She starts crying and I forget my anger instantly. I let go of her hand to wrap my arms around her. I know that I will never be able to stay angry at this girl, no matter what she does. Even if she told me that she had killed a man I would forgive her.

"Shhh, baby. It's okay. You're okay. You have the watch." I rub her back and kiss her hair as she nuzzles into my neck. Her lips brush against my skin and I wouldn't be able to hold back if not for the tears I can feel pooling on my shoulder.

This moment could last for an eternity and I wouldn't get tired of her. I know that I have fallen for her. I know there is no way around it and I'm terrified. I just wish that she could see that, but I know it's much too soon. When the water starts to boil I regretfully pull back from her.

"We can drink our coffee inside." I say and give her a hand up from the log. She wipes her eyes dry and nods her head.

"Thank you, Bell." She says after taking a seat in the chair. She is fidgeting with the watch on her wrist.

"What happened to him?" I ask as I run my finger over the cool metal on her wrist.

"He was into some bad things. He was a bad guy, but really he was so much better than the other ones." She sniffles and accepts the cup I hand her.

"He died?" I ask.

"No, worse."

"There's worse?" I can't fathom the idea.

"Yes. He was betrayed by the woman he loved. He was betrayed by everyone. They left him to die, but instead he got arrested. He'll die in prison. They gave him the maximum sentence because my mom was a key witness. She did it to _save_ us." She practically growls the word save and makes air quotes.

"She is the one who should be there. Heck, I should be there. I was supposed to be." She reaches down to the pant leg of her jeans and pulls it up to show an ankle monitor.

"What happened?" I ask reaching out to touch her ankle. It's hard to take in what she's saying but I can tell that she's being sincere.

"I hurt a man. The man that I thought had turned on my dad. Turns out it had been my mom and I got in that mess for no reason. It should have been her that they took down."

I have never heard such hatred in someone's voice before.

"Wait, your mom?" And I thought my family was messed up. "What did your dad do? Who is he?" I ask trying to take in all that she's said.

"I can't say." She looks up to me with her bright, blue eyes. "Now how about we stop talking about my screwed up life and you help me forget about it?"

"I thought you didn't want this to happen again." I say and immediately want to slap myself. If a girl wants to lose herself in you, you let her.

"What can I say? I make horrible decisions." She runs her hand up and down my inner thigh.

"Well then, I think I can help with that." I wink. I want to know more about what's going on, but I know that she can't handle anymore right now.

"So, I think I have a deck of cards, we could play go fish." I offer in a sarcastic voice.

"I'm thinking something a little less, clothed…" Clarke leans forward to whisper in my ear and then nibbles on my lobe. I suck in a breath and completely forget about the jokes.

I reach out and she jumps into my arms. Our lips crash together. We are fighting a battle that we both could win. When my tongue plunges into her mouth she bites down on it, not hard, but just enough to make me groan. Her eyes are wide open and staring into mine. When I stand up bringing her with me she happily wraps her legs around me and giggles when my hand hits the back of her knee.

She squirms away from my touch.

"Ticklish, Princess?" I whisper.


	28. Ticklish

"Stop it, Bell!" Clarke squeals as my fingers dig into her skin. She is slapping my arms and giggling so much that she has tears streaming down her face. These tears I can handle.

"Sorry, Princess." I pull my hands back from her legs and let her catch her breath again before pulling up her shirt to tickle her stomach with the scruff on my face.

She falls into another fit of laughter as my whiskers rub against her stomach. I place butterfly kisses along the same pathway and her laughter stops. When I look up I can see her eyes are dark and hungry.

My hand goes to her shirt to pull it up just a little more and I move my mouth farther up. But, instead of doing what she thinks I'm going to do I lean down and blow a raspberry.

"Are you serious, Bell?" She giggles when my fingers dig into her side. She is the most ticklish person I've ever known. I never knew how much I loved seeing her laugh until it was because of something I was doing. I never knew how much I loved laughter in general until now. Usually girls do it just to get attention, but I know this isn't the case with her.

"I'm sorry, really. It's just so fun. I love to hear your cute little giggle." I move one hand down to the back of her knee again and she snorts. Her hand flies to cover her mouth and nose. Her cheeks are bright with embarrassment. I let out a deep laugh. Even her snort is cute.

"Bell, I am going to kill you!" She squeals and wiggles her legs to flip away from me and does a back somersault off of the bed.

"Princess, you can't do anything. I'm not ticklish." I say but still hold my hands up in mock surrender. We both know she has her own set of weapons.

"Are you sure about that, Bell?" She has an evil glint in her eyes.

Suddenly, I'm not as sure about anything anymore. All I know it that I've never been so attracted to a girl in my life then I am at this moment. Yes, I'm in trouble.

"Princess…" I hold my hands up again and say in a bold whisper. "Princess, really I'm not, Princess…"

She leaps on top of me and attacks me. Her fingers find the one spot on my hard body that gives in to her tickling. I fall apart in her hands as tears spring to my eyes.

"I knew the mighty Bellamy wasn't as tough as he tries to make people believe." She giggles as her fingers dig into my left side. The place that only I knew about.

"Uncle!" I shout. "Uncle!"

"Wow, did you just call me your uncle?" Clarke gives me a smirk letting me know that she understood. She pulls her fingers away from me and I suck in a deep breath.

"Okay, you win, Princess. I don't know how you survived."

"Ah, did I hurt the feelings of the Mighty Bellamy?" She sticks her tongue out at me.

"What's with this _Mighty Bellamy_ thing?" I laugh.

"What's with the _princess_ thing?" She counters.

"You make me think of a princess," I watch her eyes lighten, "you know, like a crazy princess."

"Just shut up, Bell." She giggles.


	29. Backstory

Later, Clarke and I are lying tangled up in each other as the sun pours in through the small window. I absentmindedly play with her hair by twirling it around my fingers. I can tell that she likes it because whenever I stop she moves her head closer to me.

Now, she's lying, sprawled across my chest drawing invisible circles with her delicate fingers. I can feel the roughness of her ankle monitor rubbing against my leg, but I don't say anything about it because I like feeling her foot brush up and down along my calf.

I lift my head from the soft pillow just enough to place a kiss on her temple and then lay back down. My hand that's not playing with her hair is making its way across her ribs as if they are a harp and I a musician. Something flashes in my eyes and I flinch away from it.

"Sorry," she whispers as she pulls her arm out of the sunlight. I look down and see that it was her father's watch that was reflecting the light.

It makes me wonder again just why it's so important. If I had loved my father would I have kept something to remember him by? Would he have something of mine? Ha! No way. That just shows weakness. You can't care for people enough to hold on to something that belonged to them. When they leave, not if, you need to let them go. People don't come back so you shouldn't waste your time on them. But, with Clarke I want to. I want to know why she has it.

"So I've got to ask you. I get that the watch was your dad's but why were you so upset when it was missing? Surely you have other things to remember him by." I finally say when I just can't hold back any longer.

"What?" She asks in a groggy voice as if this is the last thing she ever thought I'd ask or maybe she was drifting off. "Oh, right. It's just a stupid superstition really."

"I may not have known you long but I can't believe there's anything stupid about you." I point out as I take her in my arms and sit up. When I'm in an almost sitting position I lean back against the wall and pull the covers up around us. It's not cold, but I like how it brings her closer to me.

"That's sweet of you to say, but I've done plenty of stupid things." She gives me a pointed look and then looks at the bed and back to me.

"We all have Princess. We all have. And this isn't one of them, so what's this superstition?"

Clarke starts to play with ring that I have on my middle finger so she doesn't have to look at me. "Well, he's had this watch since before I was born. He used to call it his time maker because no matter what when he was wearing it things worked out, especially when he was running late. He said that once he got this watch he was never late to anything no matter how late he left. Of course, he exaggerated but still it was his lucky watch. He wore it constantly, even into the shower."

Clarke continues to fidget with my ring, spinning it and spinning it. Round and round.

After taking a deep breath she continues. "Anyway, when I was little I always was asking for him to take it off so I could try it on and every time he'd say no. He was worried that if he were to take it off then he would lose his luck. The day he was arrested we had a big fight. Something was going on and he wasn't telling me what it was. I got angry and I did something stupid. I threw this picture frame at him. It was one of our family pictures; one with the three of us smiling and none of us looking at the camera. He put his arm up to block himself and the frame hit his watch. It hit with such force that it sprang open and fell off his wrist."

"I'm sorry, Princess." I smooth her hair down with one hand and rub her back with the other.

"We both looked at his watch just lying there in the dining room. Neither of us bent down to get it. Neither of us spoke. We just stood there staring at his lucky watch. When he went out that night he still hadn't picked up his watch. Then it happened. I'm smart enough to know that it really wasn't my fault but I can't help but feel responsible. I mean, what if it really was the watch keeping him safe all of those years. What if I hadn't thrown that picture at him? Would he still have left?"

"That's not fair. He's a grown man. He made a choice. The watch is just that; a watch."

"I know, but when I took the watch to him before he got locked away he told me to keep it on always so that I would be safe even without him. This morning when I woke up I realized that it was gone. I just kind of freaked out and I couldn't remember where the house was."

"You could've woken me. I would have taken you right then and you wouldn't have had to be so upset." I tell her and lift her chin so that she's looking into my eyes.

"You were so peaceful. I didn't want to disturb you." She says in her innocent voice.

"You will never be a disturbance to me, or at least a bad disturbance." I wink. "Next time just wake me up, okay?"

"Next time?" She raises an eyebrow at me to let me know she's teasing.

_Knock! Knock! Knock!_

"Who is that?" Clarke whispers as her face falls and she wraps the covers tightly around her.

"I don't know. No one has been here but me." I say as my heart starts to race.


	30. The Visitor

"Hey, baby! Why is the door locked?" A voice sounds from outside; a voice that I know all too well.

I look over at Clarke who is holding the sheet up around her as she starts to grab her clothes. I can tell that she recognizes the voice too. She gives me a worried glance, like she's the one who doesn't want to be caught with me. The thought hurts more than I'd like to admit. She grabs her pants and chucks mine at me.

"Hurry up and get dressed." She hisses as she throws my shirt that smacks me in the face.

"Clarke, I really don't know how she's here. I promise I've never brought anyone else up here." I whisper back as I step into my jeans.

"Whatever, Bell. Just tell me there's a back door that I can sneak out." She pulls her shirt over her head and I hate hearing how callus she sounds. She really must not think much of me.

"Princess, I really am not that kind of guy." I reach out to grab her arm and she just looks away.

"It's fine Bell, just like last night it was fun and hey, you helped me forget about my problems for a good couple of hours. So, thanks." She steps into her red shoes.

"Baby, are you sleeping? Let me in." The girl calls from outside and she bangs on the door again.

"Thanks? That's all you're going to say?" I ask feeling like I've been slapped.

"Yeah, now how can I get out of here without your _friend _seeing me?" She gives me a cool stare.

I pull my shirt on and step into my boots as I try to calm my raging temper. Her callus words are making me angry. I know that I should control my temper but something about her just brings it out worse than with other people. I look around the cabin pointedly.

"What? Do you think I built a smugglers hatch or something for all of my whores?" I spit at her.

I instantly feel bad when I see the hurt in her eyes before they go blank again.

I step closer to her again and even though all I want to do is wrap my arms around her I hold them down. "Listen, I'm sorry, okay? It's just that I like you and I don't want you thinking that I think of you as just someone to have fun with. But, I'm also stressed because I didn't think anyone knew about this place. And if Kennedy knows then her dad will know. I've lost my one place that I could be myself. I never really cared about it but all of a sudden I actually want someone to know who I really am. And if she sees you here then it's all over." I take a deep breath and look down.

Clarke hooks her finger under my chin and tilts my head up so that I can see her eyes burning with an emotion that I can't place. "Bell, I get it but I really don't want her to see me either. I have my own demons that I'm running from. Just tell me where to go."

"Okay, well there really isn't a way out. I have a closet." I say and cringe.

"Fine, I'll hide in the closet. But, you seriously owe me." She winks.

"I did have to talk to your mom…" I joke as I open the door for Clarke to get inside.

"Bellamy! I'm sick of waiting! Open the freaking door!" Kennedy yells and kicks the door.

"Don't get your panties in a knot, Ken! I'm coming!" I open the door to see a livid Kennedy. As soon as she steps inside her anger changes to disgust.

"Ew. You actually choose to be in this dump?" She pinches her nose as if it has a foul odor.

"What do you want Ken?" I ignore her question.

"Where's the whore?" She asks with a flick of her wrist.

"The only whore here is standing in front of me." I say and give her my best glare.

"Tsk, tsk, Bellamy. That's no way to talk to your girlfriend. Now where is she?" She smacks me on the chest and lets her red nails scratch me just enough to leave a mark as a warning but all I am worried about is the fact that Clarke can hear us.


	31. Dealing With The Devil

"Ken, why are you here?" I ask through gritted teeth.

"I'm here to see you obviously. You left the party so early I didn't get to give you your present." She leans forward so I can feel her hot breathe on my ear. It makes me feel physically sick. Once again I'm hit with the question of how I've been able to be near her for so long.

"It was O's birthday; not mine. I don't need a present." I take a step back and before I can go farther Kennedy shoves me against the wall.

"Bell, do you remember that time in my dad's office? Wasn't that fun? We could do something like that here." She licks my ear and I have to close my mouth to keep from puking. At the same time I can feel the stirring in my stomach and hate myself.

"Ken, I'm not in the mood. I came here to be alone." I try to push her off of me but she holds steady.

Her tongue pulls back and then her teeth graze against my earlobe and nip it just hard enough for it too hurt more than cause pleasure. "We both know you came to be with that blonde bimbo and I really don't care. I have never cared about the other girls, but don't forget who actually owns you. If you step out of line I have no problem with ending you and Octavia. If you need help I'll make sure Clarke knows just who you belong to." She whispers in my ear so that I can barely hear her haunting threat.

My blood instantly freezes and I feel a chill run up my spin. I know that she will follow through with her threat if she so much as sees me looking at Clarke again. The only way to fix this is to do something that I know will make Clarke hate me more than anyone has ever hated me, besides myself.

I slide my hands up Kennedy's arms from where they were trying to push her away and let them go to her wrists. I slowly pull our hands up so they're above her head and shift so that my left hand is holding both of her wrists. "Kennedy, baby." I whisper against her lips.

"Yes?" She asks with a giddy, psychotic look in her eyes.

"Don't worry about that trash. She's nothing to me. I just had a bet with Atom going to see who could get in her pants first and you know how much I like to win." I hits me how screwed up Kennedy is that I can say this and she's more turned on then if I were to buy her roses and chocolate. In fact when I did that she ripped them all up and burned them before asking for her real present.

"Is she here?" Kennedy asks in a silky smooth voice after biting my lower lip. She says it so quiet that I know Clarke can't hear her. I regretfully nod my head knowing that Kennedy must have seen us come up here. "Good, she'll enjoy this. Get her out here or I will make sure that Murphy has some fun with Octavia. In fact he's on his why there right now." I see the glint in her eye that tells me she's not bluffing.

I wish I were stronger. I wish that I could have another way out, but I know that I can't. Clarke will hate me but at least she'll be safe and so will O. That's the only reason I'm still here; to keep O safe. Kennedy lets me pull myself away from the wall and I open the closet door.

Clarke stares at me with empty eyes and walks out with her head held high.

"Hey, skank. I hear you had some fun with my man." Kennedy says as she runs her hands up my arm to my hair. "He's good isn't he?"

Clarke doesn't say anything. She just stands there looking as if we were discussing the weather. I can't even tell from her eyes what she's feeling.

"I asked you a question." Kennedy hisses at Clarke.

"And I chose not to respond. He's all yours. And for your information I've had better, much better but I can understand why you haven't." Clarke looks Kennedy in the eyes and still doesn't back down.

"How dare you?" Kennedy slaps Clarke across the face. Clarke still does nothing. "There's no one better than my Bellamy." Kennedy says and before I know what's happening her mouth is on mine and I hear the door slam shut behind me.

Kennedy pulls back as soon as the door shuts and pouts. "Ah, she left. Well that's no fun. Bye, Bell." She saunters to the door and stops just in the doorway. "And remember if I catch you with her again my dad will be the least of your worries. Oh and speaking of that my dad wants to see you. He has a new job for you." With that said Kennedy, the she-devil herself, walks out after Clarke leaving me more broken than I've ever felt.


	32. Miss Abuse

"Where the heck have you been?" O practically yells when I finally open the door to our house. She leaps into my arms and I hug her tight. Over her shoulder I can see a pair of shoes; Clarke's shoes. My eyes look upward to see her perfect legs and then a stoic looking Clarke.

"I'm sorry," I say while looking deep into Clarke's eyes.

She doesn't react.

"Just don't do it again big brother." O says completely oblivious to the fact that I wasn't really talking to her. "Clarke told me what happened."

My heart sinks even farther. "What did she say?" I ask while looking at Clarke and then to O.

"That she lost her watch and you helped her find it. That was really great of you Bell. I'm sorry for, you know, saying that you were a horrible person and deserved to die alone." O says with a smile letting me know that I'm forgiven. I'm relieved to hear that O doesn't know what really happened, but I don't understand why Clarke didn't tell her. Instead of dwelling on that for now I decide to act like Clarke; as if nothing has happened.

"Wait, you didn't say _that_." I say in a mock-stern voice.

"Right, well not aloud anyway." She winks and sticks her tongue out at me.

"Brat." I playfully shove her with my hand on her shoulder.

"Jerk." She pushes me back and I smash myself against the closed door pretending that she is strong enough to push me that hard.

"Ouch, O, please don't hit me again!" I put my arms up in self-defense and pout. "I don't think I can survive anymore of your abuse."

O's eyes brighten and I can tell she's having to fight hard to not start laughing. She places her hands on her hips and tries to glare. "It happened one time, Bell. One time! When will you let it go?"

"Never. It's your own fault Miss Abuse." I tease and duck out of the way of her flying fist.

"I'm going to kill that kid." She grits her teeth and then busts up laughing when I drop to the ground after her foot barely taps my leg. I grab my leg and curl up into the fetal position.

"Please, Miss Abuse, just stop. Please. I'll tell your brother." I let out a whimper and sniff so it sounds like I'm crying.

"Stop it Bell! Gosh!" O breaks into another fit of laughter. I lie on my back and start to laugh. After we both have tears streaming down our faces from laughing she helps me up.

"Gosh! Jaden is such a baby. I still can't believe he told on me." O says.

"Right? Of course his mistake was that I'm the one he tattled to." I flash back to the day when O was barely seven years old and Jaden our neighbor stole her Nerf gun. She leapt on him and hit him until she got it back. Jaden is two years older than her and she had made him pee his pants in fear. When he finally begged her to stop she had shot him in the forehead a couple of times, peeled the bullets off of him and skipped away. Little did he know I had been watching the whole time so when he came to tattle I just busted up laughing.

"Seriously. What was he thinking?"

"He couldn't think because Miss Abuse had beaten him into a _bloody _pulp."

"It was one scratch." O holds up her pointer finger. "One tiny scratch."

"That needed five stitches."

"Well, yeah." She blushes. "But still."

"I think I need to hear this story." Clarke says with a smile on her face. I had forgotten that she was here.

"Well take a seat, Princess because we have a tale for you." I say without thinking. I see a flash of pain across Clarke's face when I call her princess. I know that I can't be like her. I can't pretend nothing happened. "Actually, I have a couple things I've got to do. O why don't you tell her?"

And then I walk off to my room and slam my door shut. I now know that she really isn't as tough as she acts. I've hurt her and I was an idiot for thinking that with her being here it meant we'd be okay. I listen closely to the sound of Octavia telling her story and Clarke's laughter. I remember just earlier today when we were having such a great time. I flop onto my bed as the memories wash over me.

_"__Ticklish, Princess?" _

And now I know that it's over. How can I try to fix it when I know that I'll just hurt her again? I roll over and can smell her scent on my pillow. I pull it to me and try to memorize her scent.


	33. The Talk

It feels like days have passed but it only has been an hour tops. I wish for the hundredth time since last night that I could go back in time. But, if I could go back would I really be strong enough to give up the few hours of happiness that I had with Clarke? Never. I throw the pillow at the wall and it doesn't bring me nearly enough relief as it simply falls to the floor with no sound.

I reach into my nightstand to grab my knives. I sit up and throw them mercilessly at the board on my door. With each resounding thunk of metal hitting wood I feel a little better. I relish the feeling of pride when each of them hits their target. When I've thrown them all I flop back down and fold my arms under my head to just stare at the ceiling. It looks as bleak as I feel. Then my drowning thoughts are interrupted by a knock on my door.

Unlike Kennedy's knocking earlier this one is gentle. I don't bother to sit up. I just stay there feeling defeated and know that I don't want Octavia to come in and try to cheer me up when I don't deserve it.

"Go away, O. I don't feel like talking." I call out.

The door opens and without looking up I chuck my other pillow at the door. "I said: go away."

"You told O to go away; not me." The voice causes my heart to start racing.

"Clarke?" I sit up and watch surprised as she comes to sit next to me on my bed. She places the pillow next to her by my feet.

"Not bad." She says and I have no idea what she's talking about. She obviously notices my confused face because she adds, "The knives."

"Oh, right. Thanks." I shrug my shoulders and have to bite my tongue to keep from asking why she's here.

"So," She starts and then closes her mouth. Her blue eyes look bigger than usual.

"So?" I prompt her. I know what's coming. She'll tell me to leave her alone and that she hates me. She'll kick me out of her life and I just hope that she'll give O a chance. I don't think Octavia will survive losing another friend because of me. She's strong but she's still pure and I don't think she'll be able to keep the bitterness away if she's struck with another lose.

"I think that it would be best if –" She starts but suddenly I know that I can't stand to hear these words from her so I cut her off.

"Don't worry Princess. I'll stay out of your life. I won't even acknowledge you, just don't scorn O. She's a good kid and deserves good friends." I look away from her as I say this so she can't see the pain in my eyes. Instead of the response that I was expecting I feel a hand brush against my own. I look down as Clarke squeezes my hand.

"Bell, that's not what I was going to say. If you'd let me finish I was going to say that it would be best if we were just friends. I like Octavia and you too much to mess anything up. I get that you're with Kennedy and I won't interfere of course you are a complete dick for not telling me the truth." She says and I look up to see a fire in her eyes.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you. It's complicated." I say still in shock from her words.

"Life always is. But, just know that nothing will happen between us ever again. You have lost that chance and my trust. Rarely do people gain my trust let alone get it back after it's been lost. If you need a break or distraction from Kennedy I'm not the girl for it. I have enough to deal with without having people hate me here over something as stupid as that. Got it?" Her face is blank and I know that she's angrier than her tone of voice sounds.

I feel like a part of me has been ripped out and I don't know why she brings these emotions out in me. I've just met her and yet I feel like I won't be able to live without her. I almost tell her the truth; all of it, but then I remember the threats. And I know that she's not ready to hear how much I actually care about her. So, instead I take what I can. I flip my hand over and squeeze hers back.

"Princess, I will try my hardest to never hurt you again. And I never have and never will use you as a distraction. With you it's something different, but I will let that go." _For now. _I add the last part in my head. I hear Octavia in the living room asking which movie to watch. The choices are: The Princess Bride or The Godfather.

"The Godfather!" Clarke and I call back at the same time. We both laugh and I feel like maybe this friend thing might just work out. Or at least it's a good start.

"Now, how about we order some pizza?" I place my hand on her arm and don't miss her slight recoil. I can tell that this is going to take more work than I thought. I pull my hand back and let her leave my room. When she turns to ask if I'm coming I smile and get up.


	34. Movie Night

"So, what should we watch now?" Octavia asks as the credits start to roll across the screen. "How about a chick flick? Oh, yeah we could watch Grease!" She claps her hands.

Clarke who has been lying on her stomach with her feet in the air the last hour flips over to look at Octavia. I laugh when I see Clarke's face. She looks like she'd rather eat a rat's tail. I know that it matches my own. Octavia notices too because she starts to fight her case.

"Come on. Don't tell me that you don't like Grease?" She throws a pillow from behind her on the couch at Clarke who's currently leaning back on her elbows.

"I've never seen it with good reason." She throws the pillow back at O and it hits her square in the face as her mouth hangs open.

"What girl hasn't seen Grease? Even Bell has seen it." O points at me and Clarke gives me a questioning look by lifting an eyebrow. When she sees me nod my head in shame she starts laughing so hard that she falls onto her back. Her hands reach up to cover her mouth and I love seeing the crinkles at the edge of her eyes as she laughs. It takes all of my strength to just stay on the recliner that I'm sitting in.

"In my defense I only watched because O made me." I say as I start to laugh too.

"Yeah right! I think you know the songs better than I do. But, I guess we can go for something different." O says and starts rifling through the movies again.

"So, Bellamy, do you like to sing?" Clarke asks as she sits up, crossing her legs.

"You got me Princess. I secretly am a world reknowned singer." I say with a wink to Clarke. "O, look what you've done. You've given up my biggest secret." I say in mock exasperated tone.

"You're just lucky she left before you showered or she would have heard just how bad you are brother." O says as a joke, but it hits me hard. It reminds me that Clarke left; that we won't be the same. Clarke's smile drops and I see a flicker of sadness in her eyes before she smiles again and turns to my sister.

"I can't believe I missed that. Or should I be thankful?" She asks not letting on that she's not happy.

"Definitely be thankful." O says and then pulls out a movie with a black cover. "Oh, how about the Ring?"

"I don't know I might just go home. It's getting late." Clarke says as she gets to her feet.

"Oh, I see how it is. The Princess is afraid." I say before I can stop myself. I know that she won't back down from a dare any more than I would and I really don't want her to leave yet.

"Seriously, Clarke. Please don't make me watch scary movies with my _brother_ all night. I'll even invite some friends over. It'll be fun. Please." O is holding onto Clarke's arm and giving her her best pouting look.

"Alright, you win. I'll stay but we need some more snacks." She says giving O a genuine smile.

"Yes!" Octavia jumps up and down and does a happy dance. "I'll text the guys."

"Guys?" I ask Octavia. What guys could she be inviting over?

"Chill, Bell. It's just Jasper, Monty, Raven, and Wick. I won't even invite Atom." She gives me a pleading look and nods to Clarke in a silent argument.

"Sounds good to me. Tell them all to bring some _snacks_." I say with a smirk at Clarke remembering how she practically inhaled her pizza earlier.

Octavia texts them and then we start to pick up a little bit. Luckily it's not too messy. Clarke grabs our cups and heads to the kitchen while Octavia runs to her room to grab the bean bag chairs she has in there for nights like these.

I follow Clarke into the kitchen carrying the pizza box and our paper plates. When I get in there I see her scratching at the ankle monitor.

"So what happened? You never said." I say pointing to it. She looks at me and then back to her ankle.

"Did you guys hear about Raven and Wick?" Octavia yells from the living room before Clarke can respond. Sometimes I really wish my sister had a mute button.


	35. Spying

The next second Octavia is running into the kitchen and snatching Clarke away by the hand. Clarke gives me a questioning look before she is dragged away.

"O what are you doing?" I ask in an amused face. I don't think I've felt this happy in a long time. Maybe not happy, exactly, but comfortable. Yes, I feel comfortable.

"You won't care Bell. You're always telling me to not spy." O calls back to me and I can hear her voice coming from my room. I jog over to them and see them both leaning against the window obviously watching something outside.

"Come see, Bell." Clarke motions to a space next to her without looking back at me.

I walk up to her slowly because I'm still not sure of what they're looking at and I'm not completely sure that I want to see it. They both look so excited and giddy, I want to protect this part of them forever. And if I see what it is it just might ruin it.

"What's taking you so long? You're going to miss it." Clarke reaches back blindly until she smacks my arm and then grabs on tight. She yanks me forward with such force that I slam into her. She giggles and O tells us to shut up.

"Sorry." I smile down at Clarke who is finally looking at me again. Her eyes are bright with humor and I decide no matter what I am going to make her smile like that as often as possible.

"You're fine. Look." She looks back outside and I see what has them so happy. I just start to laugh.

"O, you owe me 20 bucks." I smirk when she smacks Clarke instead of me.

"Ouch." Clarke teases.

"Sorry, send it to him." O points her thumb at me.

Clarke pulls her fist back and makes a winding sound. I internally flinch but instead of the pain from a hit I feel a gentle tap. She smiles and looks back at the couple we're spying on.

"Don't you feel dirty spying?" I whisper into Clarke's ear.

"No, they're clearly in love." Her eyes meet mine and I see an emotion in her eyes that I can't place.

"So, if they're in love it's okay?" I ask matching her stare.

"If they're in love anything's okay." Her hand goes up to my chest and my arms are already surrounding her with my hands resting on the window well. I could so easily lean down and kiss her.

"Will you too shut up!" O groans. "Or just get a room and get over whatever is going on between you too?"

A deep blush crosses Clarke's cheeks and she turns away from me. I let her and look back out just as Raven and Wick pull apart from each other. They look so happy and I can't figure it out, sure they were friends and did so many things together but I seriously thought that mostly they hated each other.

"Was that adorable or what?" O asks with a sigh.

"I know right? At first they were fighting and Raven even hit him. Then, he just grabbed her arm and spun her to him. She still held back. I want to know what he said to get her to just melt against him." Clarke says in a dreamy voice.

"Seriously. I can't wait to bombard her with all of our questions." O claps her hands.

"No, we'll let her tell you if she wants to. What if they aren't ready for it? What if they can't let people know how much they care yet?" I ask aloud and realize that I'm not really talking about them.

"Why wouldn't they? If they like each other then they need to be honest and do something about it. Secrets just ruin things. Trust me." Octavia's words make a tingle go down my spine. I wonder how much she knows about us.

"Sometimes secrets are all we can have. Secrets and lies." Clarke whispers so quietly that I'm not sure she meant for me to hear her.

**A/N Hey guys! Thanks for reading. Sorry for this one being a bit sappy. I was listening to Sleeping with Sirens while writing it and they sometimes bring it out in me. haha. I love reading your reviews. **


	36. Please

"Raven, you are staying over tonight." O says as the third movie ends.

"You mean for the morning?" Raven laughs.

"Whatever." O pushes Raven towards her room and turns to where Clarke is passed out on the floor. Her hair is surrounding her head like halo as she sleeps peacefully. "Guess it's just the two of us then."

"Good because your bed is small enough for the two of us let alone having a third person." Raven grabs her pillow and shuffles to O's room.

The guys have all left already so it's just me and the three girls. Octavia follows Raven to her room but turns back to face me before closing her door.

"Hey, Bell?" She asks with that innocent look of hers; the one that is the reason for my overprotective attitude.

"Yes?" I ask from the recliner that I'm still sitting on.

"Thank you?"

"For what?"

"For this. I don't know what happened with you and Clarke, probably nothing, but you're the reason she came back. If you hadn't helped her today I have the feeling that she wouldn't have come back. I actually think she's almost as screwed up as you are. She needs a home just like you do so please don't let her push you away. And for heaven's sake, don't make her."

"O I have a home." I say because that's the only thing that I can think to say.

"No. Big brother you have a house, an empty house. I love you, but we both know that I'm not what you need. You need someone who won't only let you in, but someone that you can let in. That's why Raven and Wick are perfect for each other. She can tell him anything and everything and he can do the same. That's something that you deserve Bell as much as you may hate yourself you deserve to be happy."

I stand there silently staring at my little sister. When did she grow up? I thought that I was hiding my pain so well and come to find out she's known the whole time. I sink back against the recliner as Octavia closes her door. I can already hear Raven's soft snores emanating from O's room and I know O will fall asleep soon. How could I have failed Octavia so much?

"You haven't." Clarke says softly. I look down to see her sitting up realizing that I must have spoken aloud.

"Sorry. Did I wake you?" I ask sitting up again.

"No. I've been awake for a while. I just didn't want to get pulled into O's room. I need a break from people." She wipes the sleepiness from her eyes.

"Oh, then let me just grab a pair of sweats and you can sleep in my room. I'll sleep out here." I get up from the chair and walk into the hallway, but freeze when I hear my name.

"Bellamy?" Clarke whispers.

"Yes Princess?" I turn around to see her right behind me. Her eyes are bright and look nervous.

"Never mind." She steps into the bathroom.

I don't know what I thought she'd say but I won't lie. I was hoping that she'd say she could forgive me. Maybe we actually could have a shot. Maybe, just maybe O is right. I could have a shot at a real relationship. But, as I hear the water start to run I remember who I am and what I've done. Clarke will be better if she pushes me away.

Feeling defeated I walk into my room and strip off my clothes. I grab a pair of black sweats from my dresser. I am just stepping into them when I hear the bathroom door click open. I yank them up and turn around just in time to see Clarke in the doorway. It's completely dark behind her and the only light is the small light next to my bed which is casting shadows all around us. She looks beautiful even with her make up wiped off and her hair in a simple braid.

She steps into the room and still neither of us has said anything. The last time we were in this situation, which was just yesterday, we were feeling so different. I don't know what to do so I throw my clothes in a hamper and walk around her to the doorway.

"Bell." She whispers and this time I freeze but don't turn towards her. I don't think I can fight my feelings if I look into her deep blue eyes again. "Bellamy, please look at me."

"Princess, what do you want me to do?" I ask with a sigh, knowing that I would walk to the ends of the earth if she asked me to and that thought terrifies me more than Kennedy and her dad.

"Will you stay with me?" She asks in a certain reverence. I can tell that she is terrified too. She is holding her heart out there on her sleeve for me to crush if I choose.

"Why?" I finally ask as I turn to see her sitting on my bed in my shirt, the one I gave her yesterday.

"I can't sleep. I just… I'm sorry. It's not fair of me to ask. I'll go." She looks down and I hear a soft sob.

I can't take it anymore. I'm weak and I know it. I sit down on my bed next to her and wipe the tears away with my fingertips. "Who hurt you Princess? Who did this to you?"

She starts to sob and I pull her to my chest and start to rock her. I feel her tears on my naked chest and they burn as if they were my own. "You're safe. Sleep, Princess. Sleep and I'll keep you safe." I whisper into her hair and kiss it. I'm not sure how long we sit like this, me holding her as if she were a porcelain doll and her holding onto me like I'm her only lifeline but soon I feel myself drifting off.

"I don't deserve you but I think I might love you. I don't think I will ever be able to let you go." I say before I fall completely asleep.


	37. Unanswered Questions

I awake to a weight on my chest. It's a comfortable weight. I pry my eyes open to see two bright blue eyes staring at me. The night rushes back to me and I can't help but smile. Our legs are tangled together and my arm is beneath her. She is splayed out across my chest. I can tell that she is just waking up too.

Clarke looks beautiful and captivating with her hair falling out of the braid to frame her face. There are rays of sunlight coming in through the window and I can tell that we've slept in. And even though I know I have many things to do today include work I can't get myself to move.

"Good morning Princess." I say as I reach up to brush the hair out of her face.

"Good morning, my knight." She giggles and I swear she's an angel.

"I'm hardly a knight." I laugh with her quietly knowing that I don't want O to hear us. In fact I should go so that she doesn't. I hope that she's still sleeping.

"I should go." Clarke says before I can say anything. "I've got to meet someone."

"Who?" I say sitting up as she untangles herself from me.

"Just someone for something. Do you know what time it is?" She answers without explaining anything. I wonder why she won't tell me.

"Who about what? Do you want a ride?" I ask as she hops out of bed and looks at the clock on my nightstand.

"Crap! I'm going to be late. Sorry, Bell." She practically flies to the door but before opening it she looks back to me. To my surprise she comes back and gives me a soft kiss to my cheek. "Thank you for last night, really."

"Anytime, Princess. But where are you going?" I ask to an empty room.

I hear the front door close and just like that she's gone. I know it's for the best but it sure doesn't feel that way. It takes all of my strength to not run after her. I look at the clock and my eyebrows shoot up when I realize it's just after noon. I have never slept that late or for that long. My phone rings which pulls me out of my shock.

"Bellamy." I answer.

"Ah, Bellamy, my boy. Kennedy told you that I wanted to speak to you, correct?" Nyko's voice is so rough compared to Clarke's that I cringe

"Yes, she did." I respond with an even tone wondering just what she _told_ him.

"Good. Come now." He says in a clipped tone.

"Yes, sir."

"Oh, and bring your knife." He words give me a very bad feeling. Something isn't right.

"I always do." It bothers me that he took the time to remind me of something like that. He clearly thinks something is going on. I wonder what he has in store for me.

"That's my boy." He hangs up.

I pull off my sweats and grab a pair of jeans to put on. After grabbing a black shirt, my jacket and phone I leave my room. I peek inside O's room to see her still out like a light and Raven gone. That's not a surprise because Raven, like me, is an early riser. I walk into the kitchen to grab a drink to find Raven sipping a coffee while reading a book.

"Morning lover boy." She smirks and offers me her coffee.

"Shut up Ray." I smirk back and suck down the drink. I instantly feel a little bit better, but I'm still shaken from the call.

"So, how did you sleep? I slept like a log. I'm pretty sure even the loudest of noises wouldn't have woken me." She wiggles her eyebrows in a suggestive manner.

"Why are you still here?" I give her a mock glare.

"Seriously, did you two make up?" She asks with a sober look.

"We're not talking about this, Ray. I've got to go. Let O know that Clarke had to leave early and that I slept on the couch like a gentleman."

"Fine. You're no fun. About the gentleman part though you do realize it's _you_ we're talking about right?"

"Brat."

"I might be, but I'm smart enough to know that Octavia is going to be pissed when she finds out the truth." Raven's point is a good one, but I plan on never letting her know so I ignore it.

"I'll be pissed about what?" O says walking in just to hear the last part. She meets me with a stubborn stare; a look that we share. "What are you lying about?"

"It's nothing." I say and glare at Raven when O looks at her.

"The truth is," Raven starts to say and I jump in before she can finish.

"The truth is that I have to go somewhere for the night so I won't be here and I don't want you here on your own." I let the lie roll off my tongue.

"Why would I be pissed? I'm upset, but you've been gone before." She looks confused.

"Well, I'm having Raven stay here with you. You're not allowed to leave the house." I hate seeing the pain in O's eyes.

"Wait! I can't leave the house? You won't allow me? Ha! You're right I'm pissed. It's not going to happen. I'm eighteen years old. I can take care of myself. No offense Ray, but I do not need a babysitter." She hisses.

"I know, but after what happened on your birthday I just can't trust you on your own. I'm sorry, O. I just don't want you to get hurt." I step towards her and lay my hand on her arm. She pushes me away from her and glares.

"Whatever. Just go."

"I love you, O." I feel as if this might be the last time I see her for some reason. I don't know what it is, but I have never wanted to run away more than I do right now. O doesn't say anything and won't even look at me. I step into my boots and walk outside.

As I close the door I feel a sharp pain in my shoulder. I look down and see a green dart sticking out of it. My vision starts to go hazy and my tongue feels like it's made of steel. The world is spinning so much that I can't tell if I'm falling forward or backward. Strong arms grab me before I hit the ground. Someone is saying something but I can't focus on anything as my world goes black.

**A/N Thanks for reading and reviewing! I love reading what you all are thinking. **


	38. Chains and Pain

I wake up abruptly as my head smacks against something hard. The first thing I notice is a metallic taste in my mouth. I open my eyes and can't see anything. I snap them shut and open them again hoping that I'm still asleep. When I look around I still can't see a thing. My heart is racing and my breathing speeds up. I try to rub my eyes to discover that my hands are bound behind my back.

I struggle against the chains to have them cut into my flesh. I let out a hiss as I feel blood start to drip down my hands. I can smell mold and the air I'm breathing is dank and warm. I realize that there must be a burlap sack over my head which is why I can't see. When I come to that conclusion I am able to calm down a little bit, just a little.

I try to remember how I got here but my mind is too hazy. The last thing I remember is waking up with Clarke and then it goes fuzzy. My head is pounding and trying to think is making it worse. I try to relax my body by leaning against the hard wall behind me. As my muscles relax ever so slightly I feel a dull ache in my right shoulder. It starts to throb and I flashback to earlier. I can see a green dart in my shoulder.

I was drugged. They shot me with a tranquilizer dart. Of course I have no idea who they are, but at least I know something. They were at my house. Instantly I think of Octavia. They better not have touched her. I will kill them all if they touched so much as a hair on her head. I need to get out of here. I need to make sure she's okay. Raven was with her so that makes me feel better. Raven won't let them hurt Octavia.

Clarke had already left, right? Yes, I remember her saying she had to leave. A sense of relief washes over me as I decide that at least she is safe. Unless. Did she leave in time? Did they take her too? She could have been taken when they came for me. What if she's here next to me and I just have no idea. In that case Octavia could be here too. I sit up straight.

"Clarke? Octavia? Are you here?" I call out to the darkness. My voice echoes off of the walls.

"Bell?" Clarke's voice sounds scared. "Is that you?"

"Yes, can you see anything?" I ask her and try to scoot towards her voice, but I am stopped when the chains tug on my wrists. I hiss when they cut into my skin again.

"Bell, are you okay? Don't you dare hurt him!" She screams. "Let him go and I will tell you what you want to know! Do you hear me? I'll talk; just let him go!"

"Clarke? Where are we?" I ask realizing that they may not have been after me. It hits me once again how little I know about Clarke. She's talking as if she knows who _they_ are.

"Bell, shh. It's going to be okay. I'll make sure of it. Just stay quiet." Clarke whispers and then takes a deep breath.

"Get out here you evil son of a b –" Her curse is cut off when a door opens.

"Now, Clarke is that anyway to treat your elder?" A man's voice echoes around the room and he sounds worse than Nyko.

"Bite me Cage!" Clarke spits out and I wish that I could see what was going on.

"With pleasure, _Princess_." The man, who I now know is Cage laughs.

I hear Clarke struggle and yelp. I can't take it anymore.

"Get away from her! Take me and let her go!" I shout towards the voices.

"Awe, look at that, our own Opal Princess has done her job. They said you were fast, but really? That's truly impressive. He's like a little puppy; ready to lay his life down for his master." Cage laughs again and I try not to cringe when he rips the bag off of my head.

It's dark but I can see Clarke standing in the corner of the room in a dress. She isn't bound and doesn't look injured at all. I am relieved until I try to meet her gaze to find out what's going on. Her face is like stone and she won't meet my gaze. What he called her hits me. Opal Princess? She's done her job?

"Clarke? What's going on?" I ask as my heart sinks. "Why did he call you the Opal Princess?"

**A/N So... What do you think?**


	39. Princess

"What? She didn't tell you?" Cage has a sneer on his face that makes me want to punch him right in the mouth. I know if I hit him hard enough I can break his jaw so that he'll never be able to sneer like that again.

"Shut up Cage or so help me I will make you regret it." Clarke has a blade in her hand that I hadn't noticed earlier.

"Fine, I'll leave you with him to explain." He winks before leaving the room.

Clarke tucks her knife into her back pocket and walks over to me. She moves slowly as if she's worried any sudden movement will cause me to attack. Then again right now I just want to know what the heck is going on. When she gets to me she steps around me to touch my bleeding wrists.

"Bell, you're hurt." She says in a soft voice.

"It doesn't matter Clarke, tell me what's going on. I thought that this was because of me but it isn't. It's you. Are you really the Opal Princess?"

"Bellamy, it's not that simple." She gives me a sad look and kneels in front of me. She rips off a part of her silver dress to dab at my head. I shift away from her, but she just continues to dab at the now dried blood on the back of my head. I don't even remember hitting my head, but man does it hurt.

"No Clarke. It's completely simple. Just tell me if you're the Opal Princess or not." I finally push her away enough that she stops trying to clean me off.

"Yes, but that's not who I am." She says and won't look at me.

"Who you are and who you have to be to survive are two different people. But, seriously? Why didn't you tell me? I let you near my sister. I let you in my house." I am pissed. Sure I've been keeping secrets from her, but this is huge. "Your dad is Jake Griffin."

"Yes. I'm so sorry. You can't tell anyone."

"Well you don't have to worry about that as long as you have me chained up _Princess._" I spit at her.

"Bell, it's not like that. You don't understand. They were going to kill you. This is the only way I could keep you alive." She sounds so sincere that I want to believe her, but I know better.

"If you've touched Octavia I don't care who you are; I will end you. Got it?" I have to fight down the pain when I see the hurt in her eyes. I shouldn't care about her. She's the reason for me being here. She's why I am stuck in this job. She's the reason that my life is this way.

"Bellamy, I swear this wasn't supposed to happen. They weren't supposed to find me. My dad was set up. He never did what they said. He's never even shot a man in self-defense let alone what happened to that cop. My mom lied and said it was him." She is pleading with me. I can tell that she wants me to believe her but I will not fall for that again, ever.

"I don't freaking care about what wasn't supposed to happen! I care about whether or not you have my sister chained up to a wall too!" I bark at her. She falls back away from me as my voice rises.

"Don't you talk to Clarke like that; I will slit your throat." The voice shocks me almost more than any other part of this. I turn back to the door where I see the last person I'd ever expect to be here.

**A/N Thanks for reading and reviewing! Love you guys! Who do you think it is?**


	40. Hate

"Finn? Why are you here?" I ask completely confused. He is the golden boy not a gangster.

"The more important question is why are _you _here? Clarke, you were supposed to kill him. He knows too much." He turns away from me to glare at Clarke.

"He doesn't know anything. I tried to tell you at the party. He's oblivious. He didn't even have a clue as to who I was until you had to grab him." She stands up to tower over him even though he's taller than her.

"I heard him call you princess. He knew." He says as spit flings from his mouth. "How could he not know you? Your dad is the one who killed his. He was just playing you; trying to get back at your dad." Instantly I remember everything.

_"__Bellamy," my mom says. "Over there is the Opal Princess. I need you to go say hi and make sure to be nice."_

_"__Okay, Mom." I say and step closer to the girl._

_"__Hi, I'm Bellamy. What's your name?" I ask her._

_"__Opal."_

_"__Why is your name Opal?" I ask and my mom pinches my neck. _

_"__My dad says it's because I remind him of a gem." She giggles. "Do you want to see my room?"_

_"__Sure." I follow her after getting a warning glare from my mom._

_"__This is Cage." She points to a boy who's about 12 years old. "He has to stay with us."_

_"__Why?"_

_"__Because he needs to make sure no one hurts me."_

_"__Why would someone hurt you?"_

_"__My Daddy's a-" _

_"__You can't talk about it." Cage says harshly and yanks on her arm like my mom did the day I walked into the street without looking for cars. He lets go too fast and she falls backwards. Her head hits the corner of a table and I see blood. _

_Opal starts to cry and I give her a hug. I know that that makes Octavia feel better. When I look up I see that we are surrounded by a bunch of men. They are scary; even worse than my mom's friends._

_"__Let go of her!" Someone shouts. I drop my arms and step away from Opal. She wipes at her eyes and sniffs._

_"__I didn't do anything. She was crying. I wanted to help her." I say as a man grabs me by the arm. He's very strong. I cry out from the pain._

_"__Baby are you okay?" A woman pushes her way through the men to pick Opal up and she starts to sob again. "My princess is bleeding. He did this." She points at me._

_"__No, I didn't." I look at the man holding me and try to pull away from him. He holds tighter. I can see my dad coming up behind them. _

_"__Dad!" I yell to him but he doesn't smile like I thought he would. He looks grim. He takes me from the man and I willingly go into his arms. _

_But instead of hugging me he shakes me. "Boy, what have you done? I only had three weeks left." _

_"__Nothing. It was him." I point at Cage. "He hurt her."_

_"__You are going to accuse my son?" The woman laughs. "Figures, trash like you would try to do something like that. You better teach your boy some manners."_

_"__He won't have time for that. You knew the price when you signed on. You have broken the deal and will pay accordingly." A new man walks up._

_"__Kane, please. He's just a boy. It will never happen again." My dad looks so sad._

_"__He _is_ just a boy so he may go. Your boy and your wife have one chance to disappear. I will give them two hours to leave the city. If they are not gone by then they will be met by the same fate that you are destined to meet."_

_"__Thank you." My dad says even though he doesn't sound happy. He kneels down to look me in the eyes. "Bellamy you need to go. Take care of your mother and sister for me. Do you understand? They are your responsibility now."_

_"__Why can't you come with us?" I ask as tears fall down my cheeks. _

_"__I need to stay here. Find your mom and run." He whispers and gives me a hug._

_"__Enough. Go." Kane rips me away from my dad. "Leave before I change my mind."_

_I give my dad one last look before running to find my mom. When I do she already knows what's going on somehow because she picks me up and rushes to the door. _

_"__I will never forgive you for this. I would trade you for your father if they'd let me." She says and it hurts as bad as the sound of the gunshot that follows. "Your father is dead because of you."_

_I see the little girl as we go outside and I hate her. She's the one who let people believe that I hurt her. She is the reason that my dad died. The Opal Princess let my dad die and my mom hate me. She stole my family from me. All she had to do was speak up._


	41. Forgiveness

I pull out of the memory just in time to see Clarke punch Finn in the nose. "I will never let you hurt him. He has suffered enough because of me already. I will not let him die for me and I know my dad won't allow it. I can't believe he sent me here to be protected by _you._ You are pathetic."

"Princess, you better watch it. Your father isn't as powerful as you'd like to believe." He says while holding his bleeding nose. He goes to hit her back but before he can she grabs his arm and twists it behind his back. She pulls out the knife from her back pocket and holds it to his throat. She barely nips his skin so that a trickle of blood escapes.

"You will let us leave here or I will slit his throat. Do you hear me?" She yells to a camera in the corner of the room that I hadn't seen earlier. "Can you undo the handcuffs?"

She is looking at me out of the corner of her eye. I don't know what to do. I know that I can't trust her, but at the same time I need to get out. I decide to take a chance and nod my head. My mind is still reeling from what is going on and from what I remembered.

"Yes, I need something to pick the lock."

"Here's the key." She pokes Finn's neck again until he reaches into his pocket. He lets out a huff of air. "Hand it to him slowly. Try anything and you'll bleed out in under a minute."

"They'll never let you get away with this." He spits at her while dropping the key behind my back where my hands are chained.

I make quick work of the lock and stand up.

"Okay, stay behind me and they won't shoot. I will explain everything when we are out of here." She says without looking at me. Instead she just walks to the door and kicks it twice. Just before she can kick it a third time it swings open.

"Princess, we can't let you leave." Cage says and he's holding a pistol.

"Move, Cage or I will slit his throat. You know me; I don't bluff." Clarke's voice sounds so different from the shy girl that I first met.

"Men, stand back. If she gets hurt you will pay with your life." He commands into a radio and then looks at Clarke again. "You will never be welcomed back. Is this really what you want? Is a man who hates you really worth throwing away your whole life?"

It hits me that just maybe she is actually on my side. Maybe she was just a scared kid like me. She just might not be the monster I was raised to believe she was.

"Get out of my way, brother." She hisses as Finn squirms away from her blade. Cage glares at her. I realize that really it was him. He was old enough that he could have said something. He could have cleared it up.

"Mother will not be happy. May we meet again; and when that happens I will end your life with the very knife that you are using to get away."

"I would expect nothing less." She walks slowly never putting her back to him. I stay behind her like she told me to as we go down a long hallway. Soon we get to the end of the hallway where there are two doors.

"Open that door Bell." She motions with her head to the one on the left side.

I open it and see a sheer drop about ten feet in front of me. It looks like the building is under construction. Looking out I see that we are towering over the ocean. It is at least a 30 foot drop. "Clarke, there's no way out."

"I know." She steps in behind me and suddenly cuts Finn's throat, not deep enough to kill, but it definitely hurts him. He screams and paws at his bleeding throat as she kicks him back into the hall. She slams the door shut and locks it. I should be terrified of her even as she puts the knife back in her pocket, but for some reason I'm not. All I can see is the crying girl who I hugged to feel better. Then I see her sleeping in my arms. I just can't hate her.

"We have to jump Bell. It's the only way." She comes over to me and grabs the sides of my face to make me look at her. I ignore the feeling of Finn's blood on my cheeks. "I am so sorry that I brought you into this, but if it had to be anyone I at least know that you can handle it just like you handled what happened with your dad."

I have a flash of her as a kid crying while my dad hugs me. I shake my head to erase the pain.

"So, you really are on my side aren't you?" I don't know why I believe her when everything in me tells me that I shouldn't but I have to. I know that she is just like me; she's stuck in a bad situation. She's just trying to stay alive and she has just given up everything to keep me alive. She is stronger than I am.

"Yes, I understand that you hate me but I just have to say that I think I love you." She admits and looks down.

"Princess," I say quietly and hear her breath catch. "I think I feel the same way even though it's completely insane."

"You shouldn't. I don't deserve it." She still looks down at our feet. I gently tilt her chin up so that she can look at me.

"Clarke, we definitely need to talk about all of this but you deserve all of the happiness in the world and if you'll let me I'd like to try and give it to you." I lean forward so that my lips are a breath away from her. My shoulders straighten and I step back when I hear banging on the door. The door is buckling under the weight of whatever they're using to hit it.

"You need to go. I'll hold them off." She says and starts to push me towards the edge.

"No, come with me." I hold her arm.

"If I go with you they will never stop coming for me. I need to stay and pay for my crimes. You don't. The things I've done; I can't forget them." She has tears in her eyes.

"No, I won't let you. I don't care if I have to live underground. We're getting out of here together. If you need forgiveness, I'll give that to you. You're forgiven. Now come with me." I am holding both of her hands and she gives me a sad smile.

"Bellamy." She just says my name and then her lips crash against mine. Before I can react she pushes me backwards. "I'm sorry." She cries as I fall over the dam's edge. I scream, yell, and cry for her to jump. When I hit the water I feel the darkness take over even before I feel the water cover my body.

**A/N I just want to give you a heads up that there are about five chapters left in this book. Thank you so much for reading it and letting me know what you think! :) **


	42. Hell

"Bellamy, please wake up. Bell, can you hear me?" I hear a voice but I can't react. I can't tell who it is, but I recognize it. My mind is so blurry. My head feels heavy. I drift back out of consciousness.

"Bell, please just move your finger or blink your eyes. I need you. Please." I can feel someone squeezing my hand. I squeeze it back and feel tears on my fingers as it is lifted to someone's cheek. A light kiss is placed on it and I squeeze it again.

"I'm sorry. It looks like he's still unresponsive. I know you don't want to hear this but you have to consider the thought that he might never wake up." A man's deep voice says.

"No!" I shout. "I'm here."

"No. He will wake up. He has to." The soft voice gets close to my ear. I can feel warm breath on my skin. "Please, Bell. I need you to wake up. You've slept enough."

"I'm so sorry, baby." A man says and I feel the girl pull away from me. "Monty and Jasper are here. You need to get some sleep."

"No. I won't leave him."

"You won't be of any help to him if you're completely exhausted. Just come with me so you can take a shower, eat, and take a nap. I'll bring you back in the morning." He says and I feel soft lips brush against my cheek.

"I'll be back. I love you."

I hear a lot of shuffling before I am sucked back into the darkness.

"Anything?" The girl's voice washes over me as I pull out of the darkness again. I can feel something scraping against my chin.

"No, I'm sorry. I'm almost finished shaving his beard if you want me to go; or would you like me to stay?"

"Thank you Monty but you look exhausted. You don't need to stay, plus Lincoln is coming so I won't be alone."

"You aren't alone. I'm here." I say but of course no words come out.

"Octavia you do realize you're playing with fire right? I bet Bellamy will wake up just to beat up the guy who's sleeping with his sister." Monty laughs.

"What?" I bellow. "You're having sex with Lincoln? What sort of hell am I in?"

"Shut up, Monty. He can probably hear us."

"Like the two of you don't make out while you're in here." Jasper adds. I realize that I'm getting better at recognizing voices.

"That's different. It could be anyone." O says.

"Right." Jasper says and he starts to laugh along with Monty.

I have never tried so hard to just open my eyes as I am right now, but still nothing happens. I'm worried that I've died and this is what Hell is. Will I ever get out of here?

My mind starts to swirl again and I can't fight the darkness any longer. The last thing I hear is Octavia laughing.

"Bellamy, I'm not sure if you can hear me or not but I just couldn't leave without making sure you were okay." I know that voice instantly. It's Clarke. I feel her hands on mine. She's so cold and I want to hold her close to me. I want to tell her that I'm okay; that I'm alive.

"I'm so sorry. This is all my fault. I should have just pushed you away. I was weak. I should be the one in this bed not you." I can hear her sobs and they shatter my heart.

"I love you. Please be okay. Please wake up. We need you. I need you. Bellamy, just don't give up." She kisses my stiff lips and I feel my heart rip in half as she pulls away after I've still done nothing. "Bellamy you are stronger than this. Fight."

I pry my eyes open and for the first time since I woke up in this bed they actually move. The bright lights are blinding so I scrunch my eyes closed and moan.

"Bellamy?" Clarke asks.

"Clarke." I say and hardly recognize my own voice from how raspy it sounds.

"No. It's me, Octavia." She says and I open my eyes slowly this time to see O leaning over me. She has tears in her eyes. "You're awake."

She wraps me in a tight hug. I can't move my arms yet so I just lie there. I look around the room and don't see Clarke.

"Clarke?" I ask in a groan.

"She's not here." She says and I can tell there's something she isn't telling me.

"Tell. Me." I grunt.

"She died that night, Bell. I'm so sorry." She hugs me again and I feel tears well up in my eyes.


	43. Wake Up

"Bell, wake up. We need to go." Clarke's raspy voice cuts through my hazy thoughts.

"Clarke?" I moan.

"Yes, we need to go. Can you get up?" She is tugging on my arms.

I'm so cold that I start to shiver. I link my arms and feel cold water on me. I open my eyes to see that we're at the edge of the water. Waves keep lapping up to hit my legs that are so cold that I can't even feel the water really.

"How are we here?" I groan from the pain in my arm as I try to sit up.

"I pushed you in, but when I saw how you landed I knew that you weren't going to be okay so I did one of the dumbest things I've ever done. I leapt from the building after you. Then I pulled you to shore."

"Are you okay?" I ask worried about if she got hurt from the fall like I did. I see that she's bleeding on her arm and a bruise is forming on her cheek. "You're hurt."

"No, I'm fine Bellamy. I've dealt with much worse. Now I wish we could just stay and talk but we have got to move. You've been sleeping long enough. I'm sure they're on their way to get us." She stands up and holds her hand out to help me up.

I am almost afraid to touch her because then I'll know if this is real or not. I take a breath and reach for her hand. My rough hand encompasses her cold one. I let out the breath that I hadn't realized I was holding and get up. I feel dizzy so I grab her shoulders to steady myself.

"Don't worry, baby. I've got you." She says in a sort of reverence. "We just need to get to a place to hide and then we can rest."

"Okay, where?" I put my arm around her shoulders and let her take most of my weight.

"Just over there." She points to big house up at the top of a hill. "Can you make it?"

"Lead the way Princess and I will follow you. Wherever you go; I will go." I say as we start the long trek to the house.

It takes us at least an hour to get to the house, but when we do I can't relax just yet. There is a light on inside. I step in front of Clarke.

"I'll go inside. You stay here." I try to push her down behind a bush, but she just laughs.

"Bell, it's fine. We're safe. We can trust them." She leads me up the stairs to the big door and doesn't even knock.

She pushes it open and I feel a sense of relief wash over me.

"Bellamy?" Octavia leaps into my arms and I ignore the pain so that I can hug her tight. She's okay. We're all okay.

"O, you have no idea how happy I am to see you. I thought that, well it doesn't matter." I don't want to let her go ever, but when she finally complains about not being able to breathe I let her go. When I look behind her I see Lincoln and stiffen.

"Chill, Bell. He's with us. He's the one who saved Octavia. This is his house." Clarke's hand on my arm helps me relax. I realize just how tired I am when it gets hard to keep my eyes open. "Here, let's get you to bed. I'll help you clean up and then you can rest."

"You can take the guest room. It's the first door on the right." Lincoln says as Clarke guides me to the room that he mentioned.

Once alone inside the room Clarke goes into the connected bathroom and grabs a towel. She lays it out across the burgundy bedspread.

"Let's get your shirt off so I can see those cuts." She says in her doctor voice.

"If you did all of this just to check me out I won't be very happy Princess." I tease and she laughs.

Then she gives me a sad look. "I can't believe how close I came to loosing you. I don't know what I would have done if you had…" She breaks down into a fit of tears. I pull her onto my lap while sitting on the towel. Her body shakes from the sobs and I feel a couple tears in my own eyes.

"You have no idea. I had a dream that you were…" I can't even say it. It hurts too much. Instead I place a hand on each side of her face and pull her mouth to mine. This kiss is tender and full of sadness. We are both broken and yet when her lips are on mine I feel whole. She moans into my mouth and I lay back bringing her with me.

"I love you, Bellamy." She whispers against my lips before her tongue plunges into mine.

I feel like I've never loved a single person before her and mostly likely I haven't. I know that the dream I had was my worst fear brought to life. I hold her even closer to me and know that she still isn't close enough. I pull back just long enough to rip my shirt off and then trail kisses from her mouth down to her throat.

She giggles and then to my surprise gets up.

"Took you long enough to take your shirt off. Now let me check those cuts." She says calmly as if we haven't been making out for almost ten minutes.

"Princess, I think I just need your lips on mine to heal me." I grab her around her waist and pull her to me.

She laughs and swats at my hands. "Stop it. Seriously we have plenty of time for that. Right now I need to make sure you're not hurt too badly. And from that cheesy line I'm not so sure."

"Princess, I'm fine. Now come back to the bed." I give her my best smile and grab her waist again. This time she lets me pull her close.

"Fine you win." She sits on the bed with one leg on either side of me and her hands go to my hair.

Then, she disappears. I blink and the room is gone. I look around for Clarke and see that I am alone. I'm back in the hospital bed, alone.


	44. Good Morning

This time when I wake up I'm not surprised to find my wrists cuffed to the sides of the bed with Velcro bindings. I am surprised though to see that the room is empty. There is a remote next to my right hand that is connected to the bed by a cord. It has a red button on it with the word call under it. I press it and wait.

Less than a minute passes before a nurse comes in. I recognize her as the one who gave me the shot. She has long dark hair that is pulled into a bun and is tall. She has on dark red scrubs.

"Good morning Sunshine. Are you feeling better today?" She asks in a fake voice.

"Where is my sister?" I ask not wasting time on pleasantries.

"She's at school. She usually gets here a little after four so she'll be here in about an hour. How about I get you something to eat? Does anything sound good to you?"

"I don't care. Do you have a phone I could use? I just want to check on her."

"She's fine. I'll grab you a BLT and chips. Do you want barbeque or original?"

"I don't care about the freaking chips. I want to talk to my sister. Why won't you let me?" I struggle against the restraints on my wrists.

"You need to calm down or I will have to put you under again. Take a couple deep breaths." She says and I want to hit her.

When she grabs the IV I take a deep breath. She finally lets go when I sit back against the propped up pillows. "Original please."

"Alright dearie, I know this is hard but as soon as you are able to stay calm you'll be able to go home and forget about this." With that said she leaves me alone.

I flip the remote over that's still in my hand and see that it's a remote for the TV too. I turn it on and start to flip through channels hoping to find something to distract me. When I flip to the movie channel and see that the Godfather is on I feel a shot of pain in my chest. I quickly change it just to see Grease is on the next station.

I decide that I can't take it so I flip the TV off again. The silence is deafening so I start to tap my fingers against the side of the bed to numb the aching caused by my rushing thoughts. They're jumbled and I can't stop them.

_"__Bellamy. I'm sorry."_ My eyes start to burn with unshed tears.

_"__If you need forgiveness, I'll give that to you. You're forgiven." _A single tear rolls down my cheek.

_"__I think I love you." _Another tear escapes from my eye.

_"__I don't deserve it."_ I let out a sob.

_"__The things I've done; I can't forget them." _I can't contain the tears anymore as sobs wreak my body.

_"__If you need forgiveness, I'll give that to you. You're forgiven."_

"Why wouldn't you come with me?" I mumble as I turn my tear covered face into my pillow. "Why did you have to leave me?"

There's a knock at the door so I wipe my face on the pillow the best I can and sit up.

"Come in." I call out and hope whoever it is can't tell that I've been crying.

"Hey Bellamy. I'm happy to see that you're awake. We have a lot to talk about."

The monitors start to scream as my heart races and I fight against my restraints.


	45. Kill Me

"Ah it looks like someone's happy to see me. Of course I'd rather not have the nurses know about my visit. I hope you don't mind if I turn the machines off for a minute." Finn laughs as he pushes some buttons. Soon the beeping stops.

He comes around to the other side of the bed and pulls the chair Octavia usually sits in up to the bed. He plays with the restraint on my right wrist. I glare at him and at least feel a little pride when I see the nasty scar across his neck. I only wish that she had just killed him.

"So I'm going to assume from your reaction that you remember that night. Am I correct?" He asks.

"Remember what? That you're an evil son of a b –" I start to say until he covers my mouth.

"Now Bellamy there's no need for cursing." He teases me by smiling. I bite his finger and he yelps. He uses a pillow to muffle me this time. "Feisty. I almost hate to kill you in such a pathetic manner."

I fight against the restraints even harder to no avail. I can't believe I never saw the darkness in him. His eyes are dead. How did I miss it for so long?

"It's going to be almost as hard as it was to kill Clarke. You know what? I actually loved her. I know that she would have loved me in time, too. But, you had to ruin that. You ruined everything." He shoves the pillow against me harder. It is blocking my airway completely. I'm starting to feel lightheaded. I shake my head to try and get him off of me.

"Look at the pain in your eyes. This almost makes up for it. I wonder if it will hurt worse for you to die knowing that Clarke's not actually dead."

I buck against his hold.

"Wow. Yes. This is even better. We took her back inside. She will never get away from us again. Her father tried to get them out so her mom sold him out to save herself. Her mom even knew that we were coming for Clarke. If you had just stayed away you would have been fine; Octavia would be safe. But instead, you will all suffer."

I buck even harder. The bed is shifting from my weight and yet Finn still is holding me down. It doesn't help that my muscles are still so weak from lack of use. The pillow moves enough for me to suck in a deep breath. I don't know if I can believe him that Clarke is still alive but I know that I can't give up if it's true.

"I guess they were right. I'll have to just use drugs. I don't have the time to sit and hold you down. I've got to get back to Clarke. I'm sure she's missing me. I get to be the one who visits her in her room. Her eyes always light up when she sees me, of course not in the way they did for you, but she thinks you're dead so that light is gone."

He is holding the pillow with one hand while he reaches into his pocket to pull out a syringe. When he does this I put all of my strength into my movement and his hand with the pillow slides to my side. I yank my right arm free and hit him in the arm. The syringe flies to the other side of the room. I scream as loud as I can before he can get the pillow back on me.

"Fine. Hard way it is." He pulls out a gun and points it at my chest. I stop moving.

A shot rings out and I grab my chest. Blood starts to pool and I whimper.

**A/N Just a reminder that the next chapter will be the last one. Then I'll be starting the second book. I'll keep you posted about that, but I'm thinking of starting it next week.**


	46. Just the Beginning

"Bellamy, are you okay?" Lincoln's voice shakes me out of my frozen state. I'm surprised that I can't feel any pain. Maybe this is what it's like to die. I blink my eyes a couple of times to try and focus.

"Bellamy? Can you hear me?" Lincoln says and then yells to someone else, "He's in shock. Get that body off of him."

I feel a weight lifted off of my chest and finally I realize why I'm not in pain. I wasn't shot. Finn was. It is his blood that's on my chest. He's the one who is dead.

"How," is all I can manage to say.

"I shot him." Lincoln says taking the seat that had just been filled by Finn. "I'm sorry Bellamy it had been so long I didn't think that someone was going to come after you. I thought that maybe they were going to let you go if you couldn't remember anything. I'm glad that I kept a couple men stationed here." He says, but I can't pay attention. I'm only worried about Octavia and Clarke.

"Where's Octavia?"

"She's fine. She's in history and has no idea that either of you were in danger." He pats my arm and then notices the restraints. "They cuffed you? I can't believe this. I told them not to."

"Why? Who are you?" I ask because I know that he clearly isn't who I've always thought he was.

"Right, I'm Special Agent Lincoln Grounder and I have been in deep cover with Nyko's gang for the last couple of years." He pulls a badge out of the pocket inside his jacket and hands it to me. I look it over and decide that it must be real.

"Do you know if Clarke is alive?" I ask him.

"I heard what he said." He sees my confused expression. "I had the room tapped."

"Anyway," he continues. "That's the first I've heard of it, but we never found her body we only had Finn's and Murphy's word to go off of so I wouldn't be surprised. We'll be looking into it."

"I want to come." I sit up and flip my legs over the side of the bed.

"No. Sorry, but you'd slow us down. Plus, you're not an agent." He gives me a sympathetic look.

"Don't look at me like that. Either bring me with you or leave so I can go on my own." I give him my most stubborn look.

"Gosh! You and Octavia are so much alike. That look is deadly." He laughs.

That reminds me about their relationship. "What is going on with you and _my sister_?"

I let my eyebrows sink even farther and set my mouth even straighter.

"Chill. It's not what you think. We haven't actually had," he pauses as if realizing that he better be careful with what he says. "I mean we haven't you know, done the deed?" He finishes weakly.

"What are your intentions with her?" I ask him while crossing my arms so that my muscles bulge.

"Nothing."

I raise my eyebrows at him.

"I mean I don't know. I like her a lot. I just, gosh who would have thought this would be so hard. I'm sorry." He takes a breath.

"Lincoln you can tell him the truth." Octavia says as she walks into the room. "If he can't handle it then that's his problem."

"O?" I ask more surprised that she doesn't seem the least bit confused.

"We are in love, Bell. He was here when I needed someone. I won't let you make him feel ashamed of it." She looks from me to Lincoln. "And you? I _like her_? You better have been just nervous because if that's all you feel you'll be dealing with worse than my brother."

"I'm sorry O. You know I love you. I just, you know. You're brother's been dealing with a lot. He doesn't want to know about his baby sister being in love." He shrugs his shoulders.

"That's better. Now someone better tell me why my brother is covered in blood or I will freak out."

"Why don't we talk in the hallway and let Bellamy get cleaned up?" Lincoln gently cups O's arm with his hand and I can't help but feel happy. I should be pissed but seeing how well he handled her shows me that he actually cares.

As they leave I get up from the bed and head to the bathroom. There is a set of real clothes for me to put on and I have to choke back my emotions when I see my shirt; it's the one that Clarke wore. I pick it up to smell it and am surprised when I smell strawberry. It still smells like her. I smile. After taking a long shower to wash off the blood I pull the shirt on and breathe deeply. As I grab my jeans to put on a piece of paper falls out. Curious, I lean down to pick it up.

_Bellamy,_

_If you are reading this you have finally woken up. Please forgive me for what has happened. I tried my hardest to keep you and Octavia safe, but I'm afraid I can't. I got away that day, but like I thought they have not stopped looking for me. I have made a deal with the feds. I'm going back in to help them bring them down. Of course they tried to tell me that you were dead to get me to do it, but I knew better. I made them promise to get this to you when you woke up. Tell Octavia I am sorry. I know what you're thinking. Don't come after me. I'm not leaving this as a calling card. Grab O and run. Get out while you still can. Go and live your life for the both of us. And hopefully if I play my cards right then I will be free one day. When that day comes I hope that we can have another chance._

_I love you._

The letter isn't signed but I know without a doubt that it is from Clarke. I hold the letter tight to my chest and decide that no matter what, I am going to find her. She isn't dead and I'll make sure to keep it that way. I tuck the note into my pocket after pulling my pants on and go out to see Lincoln and O sitting on the couch.

"I'm ready to go home." I tell them. It will be easier to sneak out if I'm home. "Princess, I'm coming." I say in my head.

"You're not going to be alone big brother." Octavia says while hooking her arm around mine.

"We're with you to the end." Lincoln pats my other arm. "You're not going after her alone."

"I thought you wouldn't allow me to go."

"If I've learned anything over the past few months it's that you never tell a Blake what they can or can't do." He chuckles and leads the way out of the room.

**A/N Sorry last night I was trying to post it so you wouldn't have to wait but my internet was being stupid. Also, I'll be starting the second one probably on Sunday so keep your eyes open. Thank you again for reading and reviewing. **


	47. Ark Mafia Unleashed

I wake up abruptly and hop out of my bed. Not even bothering to pull on my sweats or shirt I run into the kitchen. Lincoln and Octavia are sitting at the small round table we have in there. Octavia is sipping a coffee that I know it more sugar and milk than coffee. Lincoln has a cup of coffee that looks blacker than normal coffee. It looks to be untouched. He's speaking in a hushed tone to someone on his phone.

When Octavia sees me standing in the doorway she pulls her feet off of Lincoln's lap. Lincoln sits up now, aware that they're not alone anymore. He lets his hand that had been resting on O's thigh drop to his side.

"I have to go." He says into his phone.

"Yes. We'll see you soon." He hangs up the phone and places it on the table. That's when I look around to see that there are a lot of things different about our place. Most of the differences I'm sure are from Lincoln's touch. It hits me that he has been here a lot more than I thought at first. When I first woke up in the hospital bed and found out they were together which was a week ago he promised that they hadn't done more than kiss, but now I don't believe him.

"Lincoln, can I talk to you in my room?" I ask in a tense voice.

**A/N I just wanted to let you all know that I've started the second book. It's call Ark Mafia Unleashed. I have the full first chapter up. This is just a taste of it :) Thanks for reading!**


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